Life in Motion

Tues. 5/25/10: Day 3 Windhoek, Namibia

2010-11-15T19:47:00.000-08:00

The trip to Namibia has been a long, uncomfortable journey. Tucson to Atlanta to Amsterdam to Johannesburg (overnight in hostel) to Windhoek. I remember reading about Ben Franklin traveling overseas to Britain for 4 or 6 months at a time. He made this trip several times in his life which would mean he spent years of his life in transit. He probably enjoyed the journey because how else could you handle sailing for that long? The same crew every hour of every day for months might drive me crazy. The plane was okay since not only did I have Scott to travel with, but also because we were able to sit in exit row seats with more leg room for most of the flights. Amsterdam to Jo burg was difficult in a regular seat and a Dutch guy taking up more room than necessary while reading his newspaper.

Jo burg had a lot of billboards getting ready for the World Cup but I didn't see much of the city. We just checked into our hostel and bought beers at a nearby Portuguese restaurant because it was the only place open.

Windhoek seems like a typical small city with lots of expensive tourist traps, street vendors selling trinkets, very few restaurants, and no bars that I saw. I ate at a tourist cafe with a fellow range student, Spencer, and Steve, who just finished a semester in Singapore. The tomato, mozzarella, and pesto sandwich with garden fresh salad was a delicious masterpiece.

We camped at a campsite with an expensive restaurant that offered game animals like Kudu, Oryx, and Giraffe. Oryx seem abundant so I tried it and really enjoyed the fresh, juicy taste of the tender meat. It was very comparable to fillet mignon crossed by pork. The native woman who seemed to be in charge at the restaurant seemed burned out by tourists and was extremely rude and unhelpful. I tend to give people the benefit of the doubt (especially when I feel like a visitor) but she was so rude it was comical. She consistently answered questions before they were asked with an unamused, "No!" We asked her how the giraffe tasted and she told us that it was very tough and we wouldn't like it.

Today we went to Daan Vintergult Reserve to get our first taste of southern African wildlife. We drove into the park and stopped on the side of a slope looking down at a large water hole. We first spotted a wildebeest, which seemed very cow-like as it stood still and stared at us unamused. It was probably 200 or 300 meters away. Actually we first spotted a zebra, which completely stunned me. I watched it walk up a grassy hill away from us with its beautiful black stripes perfectly lining the posterior of its body. It was a gorgeous animal. We saw the zebra again ten minutes later when it was bucking and standing on two legs in what appeared to be a playful gesture to another zebra. We also watched two oryx walk by with their straight horns rising up at a similar angle to their body.

A water hole less than 1km up the road displayed a group of wildebeest standing off to the side with baboons walking around and picking insects off each other near the water. A large, hump-backed animal with beautiful spiral horns walked toward the water accompanied by a female. This outstanding animal is called a Kudu.

We had lunch in the parking lot and then took a walk through a wash where we saw two skinks and lizards nearly a meter long with yellow and black heads! The lizards mostly sunned themselves but also interacted by bobbing their heads up and down and jumping to other rocks to perch on.

According to Dr. Wilson (Tom), we will see these animals and others up close at Etosha National Park. This was a thrilling day for me, getting a chance to watch the animals and see a landscape similar to the southwest really come alive with life. I noted to the other students in my vehicle that I have literally been waiting my whole life for this African experience.

The Gentle Giant

2010-07-14T08:31:00.000-07:00

I am very glad to be writing this story for all of you myself rather than my lead instructor, Dr. Wilson, telling the story of my tragic death in Puros, Namibia. I think a first-hand account is better than a pieced together story anyway. So perhaps I made it out alive for the sake of this story.
At around 6am on Monday 6/28, our camp was awoken by the sound of an elephant eating the leaves from the Mustard trees that surrounded our campsite. The elephant slowly made his way through the campsite while everyone stayed in their tents quietly. A group of girls were sleeping under a tree about 3m from where the elephant entered the camp. As soon as the elephant was out of site behind one of our trucks I entered the camp and sat quietly with the girls to watch it eating. It was a really exciting way to start the day. The elephant soon left and everyone slowly emerged from their tents while I gathered my daypack together for my usual morning hike.

While I was off on my hike, most people stayed arond the camp to eat breakfast and take showers. After a little while the people in the camp heard a loud trumpet in the distance. This spooked one of our professors, who quickly hurried back to camp while the others wondered what had caused the commotion. Shortly later, the answer came in the form of me staggering into camp with blood dripping from between my eyes and a distant look on my face.

This day I decided to expore the other parts of the campsite to see how many more elephants there were. I found a large bull feeding on a Mustard tree at the opposite end of our campsite. I slowly approached him and he stopped eating to check me out. I stayed a good distance away from him and sat down under the shade of a tree to write in my journal and watch him eat. He didnt' seem to mind because he went right back to eating. It was so cool to watch this enormous animal tear the branches of the tree with his trunk and shovel them into his mouth. I was so big, yet so slow and careful with how he ate. I heard a rustling in the distance to my left but I decided to ignore it while I wrote in my journal. After about 20 minutes I finished writing and decided to check out the noise to my left. The elephant in front of me was still happily eating and didn't notice me leave. I walked outside of the camp into a sandy area with sparse vegetation. I walked between a few shrubs and decided that whatever made the sounds that I heard had left so I turned around and began to walk to where I was sitting earlier with the elephant. As I came around a shrub, the elephant that I was watching was now moving towards me and he was only 30 meters away. I stayed close to the bush and didn't move, hoping he would just continue on his way and take no notice of me. He stepped to his left and then turned to face me, letting out an earth-vibrating trumpet and charged toward me a few meters. This freaked me out so I backed up with my hands to my side showing that I see he's upset and I'm moving out of the way. He wasn't satisfied with this so he let out another trumpet, waved his ears, and took off on a full charge directly at me. I immediately turned around and sprinted as fast as I could across the sand. My shoes sunk in with every step so I didn't take long strides, but rather quickly shuttled across the sand. Although, I blacked out for most of this, I remember thinking my only chance was to find cover in one of the dense patches of vegetation. The problem was that the closest one was about 50 meters away and to my side so the elephant would be able to close in on me easier. I had no other options so I ran in that direction. I dropped my camera while I was running and thought for a second to pick it up but I could feel the elephant's footsteps on the ground and in my chest so I let it go. The vibration in my chest grew harder and harder as I came to the edge of the bush and dove in head first. For those of you unaccustomed to the vegetation in the desert, I'll give you a description of just one of the trees in this "safety zone" that I found. The Acacia erioloba tree is like the Mesquite in the southwest, only it's thorns are about 2 inches long and they cover the entire tree from trunk to the tip of each branch. The bush I dove into was very similar - it had thorns in place of leaves. As soon as my head touched the bush, my had was ripped off my head and I didn't quite land on the ground. I scrambled and dug my hands into the sand and began scurrying through the branches and thorns. The image that I had in my head was of my being drug out of the bush by the elephant's trunk. After just a few seconds of struggling I made it far enough into the cover to a place where I felt safe enough to stop without the chance of the elephant charging through partway after me. This was the moment I regained my awareness of what was going on. My heart was pounding, my whole body trembling, and I was breathing so loud that I was afraid the monster would hear me and try to come in after me. A moment later, I watched the profile view of the elephant as he calmly walked in front of the bushes away. I waited for a few minutes and then slowly made my way out of the cover. I peered out of the bushes and listened but saw and heard nothing. I looked down at the ground and saw 4 enormous prints that slid into the edge of the bush. I was able to find my camera in the sand and it took several hours to get it working again. I was still shaken from the attack but wanted to get back to the safety of our camp so I hurried back, all the while looking over my shoulder for elephants preparing to ambush me.
It turns out that elephants are just plain assholes. If you get in their path, they use their size as an excuse for the right of way. Tourists are trampled every year by this mistake. Elephants will either charge or fake-charge but it is often difficult to decipher the two. I was fortunate to receive both from my elephant. It is possilbe to stand your ground and wave your arms, yelling and the elphant may back away but he may also continue charging. I don't think I had much of an option so maybe my next story will be of me standing beneath the trembling legs of a terrified elephant. Regardless, with any near-death experience you are rewarded with a new sense of life and I feel fortunate for this. Although this is not my first near-death experience, it is the closest I have ever felt to it. I felt the rays of the sun a little brighter that day and more appreciation for the company of my fellow travelers.

Live and Let Die

2009-02-24T14:49:00.000-08:00

It has taken me a long time to understand why some people really admire the way that I live my life. I travel on the spur of the moment, I never seem to work a lot yet earn enough to get by, and I don't seem to think there is anything wrong with this. But why can't everyone do this? This is just what I choose to do. If I wake up and feel like working, I work. If I want to rest all day, I rest. If I want to on a backpacking trip, I go. What is happiness to you? Think deeply about it. And don't think in terms of only being happy if your children are happy. Of course you think that, so does everyone else. You reproduced because it is a natural thing to do. You want you children to succeed in life just like a mother bear wants her cubs to learn the necessary requirements in order to survive. I don't think people take enough responsibility in their lives. Do you know all of the ingredients in the food you eat? Do you know what Yellow5 is? Did you see Yellow 5 hanging off a tree before they added it to your drink? Do you know all of the chemicals that are present in the water you drink from your tap? Can you buy liquor on Sundays in all of the states? Can you prevent a deer from running out in front of your car? Most of the things in our lives are out of our control. So this means you are not free. Being happy to me means being free. Free to do whatever I feel like each day of my life. I was given a template of things to do in order to be happy but the path to happiness is difficult. My mind has a lot of resistance to work through but I like to think I'm making progress. If you want to be happy, just listen to what you want. You tell yourself what you want through your daily actions and thoughts. Just sit and listen. Grow your own food. You know exactly what is in your food if you grow and prepare it yourself. Once you start a garden, you will already start to feel happiness watching your plants grow. Don't work. If you don't like your job and don't want to work, then don't. You will sit around for a week or two and get bored. Then just go out and find a job that you feel like working. If you have no option but to continue working and put off these things that you want to do with your life, that is fine too. Just accept that this is what you are doing right now and stop letting your mind focus on what you would rather be doing. Every day is only as good as you make it. Each morning that you wake up you have the option of being happy or being miserable. Regardless of what happens to you each day, it is your choice how you want to handle the situations internally. Life doesn't have to be so planned out and serious. If you want to travel through Europe, go do it. What is physically holding you back? Just go and do it. It's time people stop dreaming of happiness or thinking when they die they will be happy in Heaven. Time is relative. You can't pass up this moment for something that may or may never happen in the future. You must do what you want right now. Listen to yourself and be happy.

The Most Dangerous Road in the World

2008-07-29T07:37:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, Megan and I woke up early and met with a tour group to ride bikes down the most dangerous road in the world. Or rather, the most dangerous pseudo road in the world. There is no longer any traffic on the road but it is still pretty intense. 18 people have flown over the edge to their death since they introduced bikes to the road. I wish I could leave you in suspense but the fact that I am typing this already lets you know we are okay. However, not everyone in our group made it down in one piece. We went with a total of 9 people in our group - 2 guys from Denmark that we made friends with when we booked the trip and 5 French guys. We were all piled into a minivan (along with all of Megan and my backpacks and stuff). Megan and I were the only ones that were staying in Coroico after the journey, everyone else planned to take the van back for 4 hours to la paz. So we drove to La Cumbre listening to a mix of 80´s music. It was great. Megan says they edit out all of the instrumental stuff in the music so you get about 1 minute long songs with just the catchy versus and choruses. Stevie Wonder´s "Part-time Lover" never sounded so good. There was ice on the ground and an amazing view of the cloud forest we were going to descend into at La Cumbre. We put on all of our gear and chose our bikes. Megan chose wrong and got a bike that wobbled the whole way down. Nobody was prepared for the first 10 minutes of the trip before breakfast. It was freezing cold out and we were speeding at 40mph through a cloud forest. By the time we got to our meeting point for breakfast, I was on the verge of tears because my hands hurt so bad. We ate a hardy breakfast of bread and hot water to get us ready for the trip. What a crock of shit. Anders, one of the Denmark guys, through a fit but the guides didn't do anything about it. Oh, I guess I could explain the itinerary. We were to bike for a total of 70KM or something like that. The first 2 hours was down a paved road, the next 2 hours would be down the unpaved most dangerous road, and the final hour would be flat and downhill until we reached a small town outside of Coroico. There were 3 guides. 1 would bike in front, 1 in the middle, and the final guide would drive the van with all of our bags inside. Everyone made it down the paved road okay. Once we got to the gravel part of the road with all the winding turns and 600 meter drop offs it got a little more difficult. I was racing down the road behind the two guys from Denmark but had to stop because the chain fell off my bike. I put the chain back on and road for maybe another minute or two before I came up to one of the guys laying on the ground holding his leg while the other was picking up pieces of a shattered helmet. The front brakes locked up on Peter´s bike and sent him head first into a rock wall. His helmet shattered on contact as the back of his head and back crashed into the wall. He had a gash on the back of his head and some nice cuts on his hand but otherwise seemed okay. Anders was riding behind him and saw the collision, which made him panic and bite it too. He landed on his hip and knee and suffered from the pain the rest of the way down the road. He was happy to pull down his pants to reveal his injury and speedo thong at any opportunity. It took a while for the van to finally make it down because the French guy riding in the back of the pack evidently bit it face first into the ground because he had a band aide covering a nasty gash from the side of his nose down through his upper lip. Those were really the only injuries from our group and I didn´t hear of any deaths from any other groups. The ride was so much fun and absolutely beautiful. We started out on the top of a dry, desolate mountain with el paca running around, rode through a cloud forest, under waterfalls, and ended up in a thick jungle. At the bottom, we all had drinks and returned the riding suits before leaving for Hotel Esmerelda in Coroico for our lunch buffet. This is also the hotel that Megan and I booked a honeymoon suite at so it all worked out well. Aside from the paper thin wall between the suite next to us, the room is amazing. Hotel Esmerelda is situated on the side of a mountain overlooking the camino muerte and jungle. We watched the clouds move over the mountains from our balcony last night. I can´t wait for the clouds to lift so we can see the glaciers in the distance. This is one of the few places we have stayed at that has had reliable hot water in the shower. i never realized how nice hot water is until being forced to take cold showers on this trip. I´ll send pictures as soon as I figure out how to get them on the computer or when I get home. Our next plan is to take a 14 hour bus up to Rurrenabacha to go on the pampas trip on a boat through the jungle. The Denmark guys did it and said they saw anacondas, monkeys, tons of birds, and swam with pink river dolphins. It´s going to be really touristy just like everything else but I`m looking forward to it.

Quick Email from Puno

2008-07-25T09:56:00.000-07:00

This computer sucks so i am not going to bother fixing mistakes. So bare with me here... We are in Puno and just visited the floating islands in Lake Titicaca. interesting but terribly touristy and exploited. We are on our way to Copacabana in a few hours. Machu Picchu was an incredible trek. We hiked through glaciers and jungle and swam in hot springs. we hiked over 16K every day and it was quite difficult for the first couple of days. I would do the trek and forgot going to Aguas Calientes and Machu Piccu...terribly touristy but i guess the sight is worth looking at. I´ll talk more when i have a chance...maybe in a bus station. We slept surprisingly well on the bus to Puno last night but fell asleep o the boat back to Puno this morning. I´m also starving so we need to eat. My health is good as always and I have been purifying the water to save money and plastic. Megan has finally switched over to my method after using me as a guinea pig and seeing I didn´t get sick. She is finishing her giardia medication in a couple days and will hopefully start feeling normal again. News from Joe is he had giardia too, lol. Love to all 3 of you and I hope to talk to you soon.

Arrival in Cusco

2008-07-25T07:06:00.000-07:00

My flights were "uneventful" as you would say, Mom. Everything was on time and the layovers weren't too bad, although I did spend 4 hours on the floor in the Lima airport. I made some friends in Panama as well as in Lima when I was waiting around to check in for my flight. I arrived in Cusco at 7am yesterday. There was a small, local flute band playing music in the baggage claim area. The airport was tiny and the music just added to the feel of the place. Cusco is sooo beautiful. It's pretty small in comparison to Lima and has mountains and glaciers in the distance surrounding the city. Megan was outside standing in a huge crowd waiting for me. I, of course, didn't see her so she had to yell at me and then ran over to greet me. I can't even tell you how pretty she looked. She was wearing a little black fleece with a white scarf and had a huge smile on her face. We had breakfast at a restaurant catered to western tastes that her Pro Peru colleagues recommended. I'm in Irish heaven here because they have over 250 different types of potatoes. I've only heard of papas and papasitas. As we walked by an alley that smelled like a port-o-potty, Megan told me that people just relieve themselves in the streets. She has seen so many Peruvian penises (peni?) that it doesn't even faze her anymore. Hmm, maybe I shouldn't type it that way. We went to Sacsaywaman (pronounced "sexy woman") and saw old Incan ruins and we sat below a large Jesus statue that overlooks the city (much like the one in Buenos Aires only smaller). We were supposed to meet Megan's Peruvian family that she has been living with at 2:30 for lunch so we rushed to find a cambio (van transport) to take us to Urubamba. The drive to Urubamba was amazing. We passed through small farm after small farm, all set up on the sides of rolling hills and a few rivers. It was nothing like our farmland in Iowa where it's all flat and 98% of the natural landscape is gone. Urubamba is situated in the foothills of the large mountain range and glaciers that I could see from Cusco. It is at about 9,000 feet elevation, a few thousand feet lower than Cusco. I had a little trouble breathing in Cusco because of the elevation and the coca tea was able to help. I have felt fine since I have been in Urubamba. We were almost an hour late for lunch and Megan got yelled at by her mom, Erma. Only one of the children was there and Megan's roommate from Pro Peru was out. We promised we would be back on time for dinner at 6:30. We packed Megan's stuff up and moved to a hostel a couple of blocks away. We got a room with a private bathroom for 35 soles or about $13. The room smelled funny and there were tangles of hair and pubic hair all over the bed. There was hot water so a nice, hot shower felt fantastic. I forgot to mention that it was freezing when I arrived in Cusco...probably about 40 degrees. Urubamba is much warmer because of the elevation difference. We went back for dinner with Megan's family at a little after 6:30. Megan said it would be okay because her mom's watch was set 10 minutes fast, lol. Dinner was more like dessert. We had something that was like a cross between Indian fry bread and a donut covered in maple syrup. It was pretty tasty. We also had purple corn mashed up into syrup called chicha morada. After dinner, we handed out all of the gifts that I purchased in the U.S. for the kids. I just got them some squirt guns, playdoh, crayons, and various kids stuff. The 13 year old girl is obsessed with My High School Musical so I got her some nail painting set or something. I didn't know what it was when I got it but she seemed to like it. We played with the kids for a little while and then said our goodbyes. For the rest of the night we wandered around Urubamba running into people that Megan has volunteered with so she could say goodbye. I cut out a little early because I was exhausted from being up all night the previous night.
Today, I think we're going to more ruins around Ollantaytambo and then to Cusco for the night. Friday, we are getting up at 4:30am to begin the Salkantay trail to Machu Picchu. We are going with another girl that Megan worked with and anywhere from 8-10 other people that will be added to our group. We hike 10K per day up a few thousand feet of elevation for a total of 5 days. I'm not really adjusted to the altitude yet so it's going to be a little struggle. And Megan has a beautiful combination of a UTI and giardia. So wish us luck and I'll send an email when I find time after we return from MP. We will probably stay in Cusco the Wednesday we get back from there and then leave for Copacabana on Lake Titicaca the following day.

Week One in Biosphere 2

2008-06-21T09:51:00.000-07:00

Let me start out by saying that I am basically living IN the biosphere. I have spent most of my time inside the sealed structure since first arriving on Sunday. Today, I received a proximity card reader and radio to access all parts of the biosphere and document who enters and exits each area with me. The professors that are running the trip stranded me here in the middle of nowhere with Melanie, the hydrology grad student that is helping to mentor/chaperone the high school kids. We are in charge of herding the kids into the biosphere to sample different quadrants within sections of the biosphere. We are also in charge of keeping them fed, including taking them out to dinner wherever they choose and we agree to. Fun, right?

I am working at the biosphere with an organization called Arizona Rivers. As I understand it, the organization was put together by 2 professors from the SAHRA dept. and UA to educate students and teachers on the value of riparian areas in Arizona that we are losing as our population grows and consumes more water. The organization provides grants and training to teachers to provide them with the funding and knowledge of how to conduct field trips and classroom projects to demonstrate the importance of this rising concern to the students. The workshop serves this purpose as well as giving the students and teachers a basic understanding of each part of these riparian areas, including water quality testing, study of macro invertebrates, animals, insects, birds, and plants. The workshop only goes for 3 days and then the students go on a tour of different riparian areas in Arizona. This part of the program is called the Riparian Research Experiment, where the students will get to implement and use everything they learned in the workshop on their own in the field. It really is a fantastic organization and I am so glad to be a part of it (at least for the next 2 weeks).

Early Sunday morning I was picked up at my house to meet up with all 3 professors and Melanie at Bashas so we could get food to last us through breakfast and lunch for the entire week. The food we bought only lasted one day. A few kids dropped out of the program and didn’t show up at the biosphere orientation so we began the program with just 3 boys and 1 girl. A dozen teachers also arrived to attend the workshop. The living arrangements for the workshop were set up in the village of “casitas” that was built originally for the grad students that were studying the biosphere with Columbia. Now, they are used for organizations such as ours as well as grad students from UA conducting research. The casitas are only a few years old and really nice. The casita I am staying in has 4 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms, kitchen, and living room. I am in a room with a full bed while two of the students have to share a room and the other gets a single. We rented one casita to serve as our meeting place for meals and entertainment. After everyone checked into their casitas, we went over to the biosphere to go over the purpose of Arizona Rivers and for an in-depth tour of the biosphere. It seems everyone knows something different about the biosphere. This was the second of I don’t know how many tours I was able to go on. I have been in almost all areas of the biosphere, including the upper rainforest where almost nobody is able to go. We climbed to the top of the rainforest and spent a few almost unbearable minutes in the extremely humid heat. We were near the top of the glass and it was covered in fog and haze as the sun tried to penetrate the thick air. After we quickly ascended, we were all dripping in sweat and feeling disgusting. You should try it sometime. We also got to go to the library - another extremely hot area. The biospherans spent almost no time here because of the heat and it took so much energy to climb all the steps to get to it (it is that circular shaped building in the biosphere picture at the top of the page).

The biosphere 2 really is an amazing artificial world complete with all the major ecosystems on earth including desert, Sahara, rainforest, and a 700,000 gallon ocean. The first biosphere project was funded by a private investor who basically wrote the biospherans a blank check for whatever they needed. I was amazed at some of the attention to detail and foresight that was used in this building that was built 20 years ago. The original carpet was 100% natural and biodegradable, handmade of mostly wool. They wanted everything to be natural and chemical free so that they wouldn’t release the chemicals into their atmosphere and have to breathe them in. They also didn’t use toilet paper because they didn’t want it to contaminate their water supply. The original plan was for a total of 50 sets of people to live in the biosphere for 2 years each. I think they should have known the first experiment wouldn’t work flawlessly as they had hoped. They went in anyway and soon ran out of oxygen because they didn’t take into account the massive amount of concrete that was used. As the concrete began to cure, it released carbon dioxide into the atmosphere and threatened to end the project. They decided to correct this by pumping in extra oxygen. The whole point of the biosphere was to be self-sustaining so this really meant a failure for the project. The whole structure is sealed and airtight and can literally be picked up and moved anywhere (hence the idea for a station on Mars). This failure also caused the 8 biospherans to split up into two groups – 1 that was still for the mission and 1 that accepted it as a failure. The fighting lasted the remainder of the project and the people went so far as to spit in each others faces as they walked by in the hallways. One of the biospherans said their main regret of the project was the reality of human behavior. One interesting success of the project was the fact that they were able to cycle all of the original water throughout the biosphere and never have a shortage or problem with water.

After the tour, we had a large dinner of lasagna and then everyone hung around outside and got to know each other until we retired to sleep.

The workshop began on Monday in a cool room used for presentations in the biosphere. Melanie and my main purpose during the workshop was to assist in the activities and direct people with what to do and where to go. After about 4 hours of lecture, we took a break for lunch and then returned for the section on insects. A grad student from UA, Michelle, was brought in as the local expert. I will say this right now, Michelle loves her bugs (notice the picture of her "sucking" the bugs into a tube). She started off her presentation with a slideshow of insects she has photographed. She was super excited and kept pointing out how cute all of the insects were. It was really neat to see someone so passionate about what they do. I really liked her and her unending enthusiasm for bugs. Her main area of study was ants but she knew a lot more about insects than just ants. I learned that Arizona has more insects than anywhere else in the country. The total number of different species was estimated by one of her colleagues at over 30,000. That night, she set up a special bug light and white sheet so we could view the insects that lived around the biosphere. She told us that she regularly attends “bug parties” with her fellow grad students near Madera Canyon to set up this type of display and look at insects all night. She also let it slip that they sometimes dare each other to eat the bugs. I tried to get her to eat a moth but she said they taste awful. We were able to see a large tarantula, praying mantis, moths, bees, and a bunch of other stuff I can’t remember. By the end of the night the ants took over and were killing and carrying off all the other insects. This may be a good area to note that “crazy ants” are the top predator of biosphere 2. These ants were mistakenly introduced to the biosphere with some of the trees they brought in. The ants killed off almost every other insect in the biosphere and we are currently trying to get a number on just how many may be in the structure. So far we have counted over 2,000 in some meter square areas.

Kendall from the Audubon Society in Tucson came in after Michelle to teach us about the birds of Arizona. Once again, we have one of the largest diversities in the country with almost 500 different species making an appearance. Kendall wasn’t as excited as Michelle but he was pretty good at naming birds and their calls. He taught us that naming the bird is just part of the bird watching experience. Most bird watchers also examine the behavior and sounds to figure out what they are doing. We woke up at 6am on Tuesday to go bird watching with Kendall on a cow trail near the biosphere. We were able to see 2 Great Horned Owls, which was pretty amazing. At one point, one of the owls landed on a tree that apparently belonged to a small finch because the finch went crazy flying around the owl, screeching in its face trying to get it to leave. We also saw a couple Harris’ Hawks, a ton of Mourning Doves, and a bunch of other birds normally seen in the area. Another highlight was watching a Killdeer pretend to have a broken wing to try to lure us away from its nest. They do this so that the predator will follow the Killdeer with the broken wing until it is far enough from the nest, then the bird will fly away.

Every evening, a group of deer venture down to the grassy area just outside the biosphere to munch on the grass. This has become my spot. I have been checking on them every night while they graze away on the grass. Melanie claims she saw them running around the field, playing games together one night. I dismissed this as mere speculation since I wasn’t present. One night I was able to witness an extraordinary event that I have been waiting for since I began hiking in Tucson. I was watching the deer as the sun was setting over the ridgeline just above them when I saw something move. I focused in on the object with my binoculars, thinking it was a coyote. As the image moved, the profile view of its entire body became visible and I saw a nub tail and tufted ears – the outline of a bobcat! It was a beautiful sight. I could make out the perfect silhouette of the animal pasted on the strawberry background of the sky.

Unfortunately, on Tuesday night I had to depart the biosphere. I had to take a 3 hour HOV (high occupant vehicle) training course early Wednesday morning so I could drive the 15 passenger vans. I really did not want to go back to Tucson and felt strange as I entered t he sprawling city. My feeling of inner peace that I was accustomed to from my short stay at the biosphere was immediately swept away. I was able to eat my usual healthy diet at my home so that was a nice perk of this inconvenience. The class was terrifying. It taught me that I was going to be driving a death chamber on wheels. 15 passenger vans filled to capacity are one of the most dangerous vehicles on the road and there are millions of them in America. The design of them is pitiful and they will tip over and roll if you try to turn at a speed above 35mph. This may be my last blog entry so savor every word.

It felt good to get back to the biosphere on Wednesday to say goodbye to the teachers because the workshop ended just as I got back. The following day we loaded the van full of kids and water and took off for Aravaipa Canyon. We hiked 13K through the canyon and crossed over the creek over a dozen times. It was amazing to see that there was water flowing here year round! To start the hike off well, we spotted a black and orange gila monster. We took as many photos of it as we could before the fat, slow creature disappeared into the brush. We spotted many different birds, fish, and deer along the hike. The most beautiful bird was the Vermillion Fly Catcher. It had a bright red head and black body. I’d post a picture of it but it was too fast for my 3x zoom to capture a decent picture. The hike was long and tiring and I kept a close eye on my GPS unit the whole way back wondering how much further we had to go. I know this is bad but I really enjoyed the first half of the hike and didn’t think once about time. I like to think that cancels out my impatience. It was hot and you would have done the same. I decided that all of my summer hikes will need to take place at a spot that has water so I can take a dip every once in a while. Splashing around with the high school kids made it so much more fun and tolerable with the heat. At one point, I bent over to splash water on my face and my camera flew out of my backpack and into the water in front of me. I grabbed it as quickly as I could but it got completely submerged. The water must not have had enough time to soak into the camera because I let it air dry over night and it works fine now. It was quite a scare. By the time we reached the van, everyone was wiped out. The professors both left to go home as soon as we got back to the casitas, leaving Melanie and me alone with the high school students. We ordered in from a nice Italian restaurant and watched a movie. My eyes were sore from looking around all day at the canyon so I didn’t pay much attention to the movie. Plus, Megan called me from Peru just as I opened my eggplant parmesian. I figured since it was an international call I should take it. I’m kidding, of course. I was excited to talk to her.

So that brings us to where we are now. Actually, I started this blog on Friday and now it’s Sunday. Melanie and I were relieved of our babysitting duties last night when John (a professor) came back. Melanie and I also had to return our backstage passes to the biosphere. It was pretty cool to work in the actually wilderness of the biosphere, off the visitors path. We had to scan our cards to open the air-tight doors and then speak into the radio and say how many people we were bringing in/out. Today, we went to a Nature Conservancy outside of Mammoth. On a side note, Myron just came in to show me his roommate’s sandal frozen in a block of ice. He is showing the kid his sandal right now and taking pictures of his reaction. Anyway, the conservancy was a career eye opener for me – or at least that is how I feel at the moment. The watershed manager, Rob, that looks over the 6,000 acre plot of land took us on a tour of the property and showed us a beaver’s den on the lower San Pedro River. He told us the story of how humans killed off tens of thousands of beavers in an effort to rid the area of mosquitoes. Genius, right? He explained the real reason for the mosquito problem was due to stocking ponds with fish. It’s really an elementary school problem that they tried to solve by killing beavers. You see, by stocking the ponds with large fish, all the small fish were eaten. Since all the small fish were eaten, there was nothing left to eat the mosquitoes. You know, the way the food chain works? I honestly question why I live in the realms of society sometimes. Anyway, Rob was a really interesting guy. He has a PhD in a marine something or other. He explained how he got to where he is today at the Nature Conservancy but his background has little to do with any of it. He has worked on many different projects since he started his schooling when he was 27. I have been having problems thinking of one area I would like to study because I am interested in so much and feel like I would be missing out and bored with one area of study. This gave me hope that there is a career path for me. I can just work on a project for a few years until it is resolved, a qualified individual can take over, or I just can’t handle the politics and move on. I can’t really explain the vision I have but don’t worry, you’ll see. I may even go back to school, who knows.

We leave for our field studies tomorrow and return next Monday. It is going to be hot and unhealthy. I haven’t even touched on the food of this trip. Before I came on this trip, my diet consisted of primarily local, organic foods. Now, I am eating almost all processed foods from who knows where. I picked up a few healthy foods to last me through breakfast and lunch for a few days while I was in Tucson.

Ruby

2008-06-08T20:10:00.000-07:00

I spent this past weekend in an old ghost town known as "Ruby." Ruby started out as Montana Camp in the 1870's and was named "Ruby" after a store owner's wife in 1909. Ruby was a lead mining town that grew to be the second largest town in Santa Cruz County (1,800 residents). It became a ghost town in 1941. Older folks in Tucson can tell you about some type of connection they have to the town. The town has not been restored and is in its original condition after being destroyed by either weather or curious jackasses. A rule in Ruby is to not lock anything or else people will automatically assume there is something valuable inside and will go to whatever measures necessary to get inside. This theory was put to the test when someone recently attached a chain from their truck to the iron door of the old record keeping structure. The door and part of the building were ripped off to reveal an empty shed. Nice job…jackass.

That's a brief history of the town; now let's move on to my experience of this hidden Arizona gem. A fellow volunteer/friend of mine, Howard Frederick, owns a percentage of Ruby along with a few other families. Howard and his wife, Pat, are the only ones who look after Ruby and spend time there. After much destruction of the town, they decided to hire a caretaker a few years ago. The first caretaker they hired didn't work out, to say the least, so they had the cops haul him off for beating his wife. He is currently standing trial as an accomplice to murder (not his wife). The new caretaker who has been looking after the town has been employed for almost 5 years. He is known simply as "Sundog." We'll talk more about Sundog later, don't worry. The plan was for a group of CSA volunteers to meet up at 9am on Saturday morning to head down to Howard's town to hang out for the weekend. Only I and one other guy, Nick, showed up. Nick came equipped with a 1971 Volkswagen van that he loaded his mountain bike and kayak into. I attached my bike to the back of his rig and we took off for Ruby. The drive down was absolutely beautiful. We passed through rolling hills, mountains, desert grassland, small rural towns with streams that still ran, and cottonwood forests. It was a nice relaxing drive to start out the weekend. I was told the trip from Tucson to Ruby is about 1.5 hours. We made it in about 2.5 in the van. The van is known for having about 55hp and being perfectly happy chugging along at 28mph up hills. Nick has been close to death after pulling this off in the Sierra Nevada’s with a long trail of cars honking furiously behind him.

We rolled into Ruby and followed a sign that directed us to check in with the caretaker. Sundog came walking out with his arms swinging wildly at his sides. He was wearing shorts, sandals, and an unbuttoned, short sleeve shirt. His hair was long and unkempt but went well with his image. The long beard with white tips didn't hurt either. He smiled at us with his bright blue eyes and told us Howard was probably in his house. Nick corrected him and said that he was probably down by the lake and Sundog confessed that he had no idea.

Okay, let's talk about Sundog now. I liked Sundog immediately after meeting him. Sundog was mentioned in the summer edition of Tucson's 110 Degrees magazine. The article he is in is about transcendence, or the feeling of oneness with all of existence that people sometimes experience. Sundog's contribution told of how he has had this feeling through the use of botanical psychedelics that helps him "enjoy all this." Sundog is a skilled botanist and herbal healer. He has a beautiful garden of flowers and vegetables outside his cottage. He has also learned a lot of herbal remedies from Native Americans and other groups he has lived with across the world. He was once bitten by a rattlesnake that he was trying to catch and eat. He survived for 3 days using his herbal medicine until Howard found him and forced him to go to the hospital. He was on the verge of death and spent 2 days in intensive care. After he recovered, a group of scientists wanted to interview him to ask how he managed to survive for so long without any antivenin. He now wears a hat made from the rattlesnake’s skin to commemorate the occasion. Sundog is described in 110 Degrees as a recluse who lives in Ruby. He is a recluse, however he is very social. He has been married 5 times and has children somewhere out there. He always has friends or girlfriends around. The girlfriends don't seem to stick around for too long, though. I'm sure this can be blamed on the slim pickings he has in the nearest town of Arivaca and I bet he's not the easiest guy to tie down in a relationship. Sundog is also a brilliant cook. The first night that Howard and Pat stayed in Ruby with Sundog, he cooked them Basmati Raccoon. It was road kill, of course, but they both claim it was divine. Howard is a former nutritionist and knows his food so I trust his opinion when he says that mountain man, Sundog, is a genius in the kitchen. Sundog is a myth in his own time and I highly recommend taking the chance to meet him. I was not able to have a lengthy conversation with him on my visit, but I assure you that it will happen on one of my next visits.

Okay, so anyway, we drove down to the lake and parked in front of this huge area of what appeared to be sand dunes. We walked across the dunes to a ramada in front of the lake where Howard and Pat were sitting while drinking a beer and reading. Howard told us that the sand dunes were actually crushed minerals from the mine and contained 20% lead. The wind was ferocious and kept blowing the sand all around into our mouths and lungs as we talked by the ramada. I couldn't help but imagine how much lead poisoning I was being exposed to. Howard claims it's harmless and the water is safe enough to drink, let alone swim in. He backed this information up with stories of old miners living to be old and healthy. In fact, Sundog drinks the lake water straight. I hear it takes at least a week for a typical person to get used to drinking the stuff.

After a while, Howard and Pat lead us up to their cottage that was situated behind Sundog's. By cottage, I mean ruins of the town that are more intact than the rest. They say they have a bad mouse and kissing bug problem. Also, they can't really fix up the place or leave any personal belongings there because as I said earlier, someone is likely to come by and demolish or steal it. The cottage served its purpose and made for a great hang out for reading on the porch or eating. Howard took Nick and me on a tour of the town which included the old school, jail, post office, and the mine. The mine had cool air blowing out of it that had a lovely scent of bat guano. Howard informed us that the bat show would begin at sunset when all the bats pour out of the mine to feed. He also added how large the mine was and that it extended underground all over Ruby. He told us that Sundog has been through most of the tunnels despite the horrid smell (I bet he doesn’t even notice).

After the tour ended, we headed back to the cottage so I could go mountain biking. By this time, Howard's son, Liam and his girlfriend, Mai-Lee, had showed up. They greeted us at the cottage with a beer. The beer was perfect after walking around the town in the sun. We talked for a little while, and then Liam drew me a map of a good mountain bike trail to follow. I took off out of Ruby, flying down the dirt road. I knew before I left that I was going to miss the trail he told me to turn off on and sure enough, I did. I kept an eye out for it as I road on but soon realized that I had gone much farther than I should have. The road was torn up like a trail anyway so I road for a few miles until the washboards in the road started bothering me...as well as my testicles. I turned off on an immigrant trail (for those who don't know, Mexicans crossing the border create trails all over the desert) because Liam said some of these were fun to ride on too. I rode the trail until I couldn't handle my legs getting ripped apart by plants. Most plants in the desert are covered in thorns to ward off animals...and apparently people with shorts too. Once the blood started touching my socks I decided enough was enough. As I pedaled back to Ruby, I noticed how tired I had become and kept hoping Nick would drive by on his way back to Tucson so he could pick me up and take me back to Ruby. I got lucky and when I was 2 or 3 miles away from Ruby, Liam came by and picked me up. It was getting close to bat time and he had to meet a tow truck for a family of hicks that got stranded. I say hicks because the man had a mullet and was wearing a shirt with a picture of Snoopy and the name "Joe Cool." His wife (or maybe kid) had blue hair with about 3 months of blonde roots showing. Hmm, there must be a better word than "hick" to describe this family.

We got back to Ruby just in time to grab a beer and watch the bats. I followed Howard onto the top of a tractor to watch the show. The bats poured out for 20 minutes and formed large clouds as they moved over the mountain and out of sight. The most recent count by biologists has been 175,000 bats but Howard insists the number has grown much since then.

Nick decided to leave after the bat viewing and I decided to stay the night and get a ride back with Liam the following day. I walked with Nick to the house and grabbed my backpack so I could set up camp for the night. I took Howard's suggestion and followed a cattle trail on the opposite side of the lake to a hidden spot behind a section of cat tails. A foundation of an old house occupied my space and I contemplated setting up my tent inside but opted for the fluffy grass by the marsh instead. I set up my tent and got my new thermarest ready for me to crash on. Then I grabbed my headlamp and continued on the cattle trail until the lake became a small stream that I could pass over to the other side and head back toward the cottage. On the other side of the lake, I noticed the skeleton of a sweat lodge. I was immediately taken back to my memories of the sweat lodge with Two Crows in Baja California. Somehow, I bet Sundog's sweat lodges are way better. I'll have to come back when he performs his annual sweat lodge in the winter.

Back at the cottage, Liam was grilling organic lamb from Trader Joe's and venison, while Howard prepared a salad made from CSA greens and Pat opened a bottle of wine. I'll spare you the details but the meal was by far the best camping meal I have ever had. It was all fresh and mostly organic and local. After dinner, Mai-Lee, brought out a chocolate cheesecake. Does camping get any better than this? The conversation and company of the Frederick family was not only interesting, but calm and relaxing after a long day outside. It was a terrific dinner all around. The food was too much for any of us to fight so we all turned in for the night. I half seriously said I was going to jump in the lake before going to my tent because of how sweaty and nasty I felt. As I walked past Sundog's house, I saw 4 sets of glowing eyes watch me from the trees. Evidently Sundog has a few cats and even a cat door on his cottage. When I got to the lake, I decided it was too cold and a little too creepy to jump in so I fought my way through the forest on the opposite side of the lake and lay down in my sleeping bag. I left the cover off my tent so I could see the stars and the crescent moon reflect off the water. I watched a few shooting stars race across the sky before shutting my eyes to end the day.

I awoke the next morning to the sound of children debating whether or not to take the canoe out on the lake. I had forgotten that a tourist family was camping in Ruby too. The tent was starting to heat up with the early morning sun and the layer of dirt and sweat on my skin told me that there was no way I was going to go back to sleep comfortably. I guessed it was 6 or 7am and was not sure if the Fredericks would be up yet. They invited me to breakfast the previous night but I didn't want to intrude on their hospitality and wake them. I decided to go for a hike and check out the area. Biologists visit Ruby once in a while to study wildlife, including mountain lions and jaguars. I knew I wouldn't see any lions or jaguars but hoped that I would see some type of wildlife on the hike. Along with some incredible views into Mexico and of the surrounding area, I saw cottontail rabbits, jack rabbits, and a few white tail deer. I hiked through the brush, straight up the side of the mountain I was camped under and hiked along the ridge for a little while before descending and finding myself at the far end of the lake. I walked over to the cottage just in time to see a plate of scrambled eggs and potatoes waiting for me. I was gone long enough to miss breakfast but my incredible hosts put a plate aside for me anyway. We spent the rest of the morning and afternoon reading on the porch (I read the newspaper with the article about Sundog) and kayaking on the lake. We all agreed how nice it was to be at peace with no cell phone, no TV., and no radio. It was just another nice, relaxing day in Ruby.

I feel very much in debt to the Fredericks for such a wonderful time in Ruby. I plan to return with a cooler full of beer and some specialty food from the CSA. Also on the list is an in-depth discussion with the one and only, Sundog.

Bienvenidos a Puerto Vallarta

2008-01-10T13:10:00.000-08:00

I travelled to Puerto Vallarta, Mexico to celebrate the New Year and soak up the Mexican culture for a week. I kind of surprised myself with the trip so I didn’t get a chance to do much planning for it. The only thing I had planned on was to meet up with Joe when I arrived since he had spent Christmas south of Puerto Vallarta in Michoacan. I couldn’t reserve us a room at a hostel so I picked the most common bar I found online to meet at, Bar Amsterdam. We would hang out for a couple of days and then I would take a bus back halfway and spend a few days before making the final assent to Tucson. I calculated the bus ride would take about 24 hours so I thought it would be nice to break it up a little. As you can see, there wasn’t much of an outline for me to follow for the trip. Here is how it went:

After spending a two hour layover in both St. Louis and Dallas/Ft. Worth, I was glad to finally arrive in Puerto Vallarta at 9:30pm on New Year’s Eve. The airport was surprisingly empty. I grabbed my bags, dodged the taxi driver’s that wanted $22 to take me 5 miles into downtown, and waited at the bus stop. As I was waiting, I noticed that every person that was on my plane had arranged to be picked up by a shuttle service to go to their resort. Nobody followed me to the bus stop. I asked a girl that was sitting next to me which bus would take me downtown. She said it would be there in 5 minutes. A few minutes later a bus drove by and a Mexican guy grabbed me and took off running after the bus. He stopped the bus and told me it was the one I wanted. I found a seat at the back of the bus and decided to try to find out where Bar Amsterdam was located. The kid next to me didn’t speak any English and had never heard of Bar Amsterdam. An older man tried helping me and acted like he knew where it was but he really didn’t. The bus was beginning to empty so I felt I needed to get off soon. I noticed two young, attractive Mexican girls looking at me and giggling as they shuffled toward the back of the bus near me. I thought for sure they would help me. They had never heard of the bar either but they knew the street it was located on. The bus came to the last stop and they motioned for me to leave with them. All of the streets and sidewalks of the downtown area were filled with people. People were walking by with cans of beer in their hands, smiling and laughing. It looked like a great time. The girls told me to just come with them but I had imagined that Joe was already at the bar waiting for me. They stopped a taxi for me and told the driver where I needed to go. I started to get in the taxi and looked back to see the girls weren’t coming with me. I asked if they were going to go to the bar with me and they gave me a look like, “We are not going to that bar.” I gave them hugs and was on my way.

The driver took off slowly down the road weaving around people. He turned around to me and said, “Are you gay?” I answered very confused, “What? No.” He informed me that Bar Amsterdam was a gay bar. I sat back and thought of how angry Joe must have been when he finally found the bar and realized it was a gay bar. It then occurred to me why the girls didn’t want to come with me. I said to the driver, “Oh, so those girls thought I was gay?” He responded, “Yep.” The driver stopped the car and pointed up the street and told me that was where I needed to go. I paid him and walked to where I pointed to only to realize it wasn’t the street I was looking for. I walked around to different hotels asking if they had a vacancy and if they knew where Bar Amsterdam was. None were helpful with either question. As I was walking, a fight broke out 20 yards in front of me. A visibly drunk Mexican with his shirt off seemed to be harassing another guy’s girl. The guy proceeded to send a couple nice punches to the drunk’s face. I hurriedly crossed the street to ensure that I wouldn’t get tangled in the affair. As I walked, it then occurred to me that I am a reasonably attractive guy and I’m sure any gay guy would love to help me out. I began to seek out the clubs that hailed rainbow flags. The second club I came to was the winner. The guy not only spoke perfect English, but he told me that Bar Amsterdam has changed names 3 times and is now called Mesa 67 and told me the exact corner it was located on. I followed his instructions and found the bar! It was exactly 11:00pm, the time I had told Joe I would meet him. The bar wasn’t very crowded and I did not find Joe there. I decided that he probably couldn’t find the bar. I left the bar and found an internet café so I could check my email to see if Joe had sent me a message. I had no new messages and it was beginning to get late. I needed to find a place to stay. I was told of a couple places to check out around the café but they were all booked. I realized there were not going to be any vacant hotels for me. I walked around hoping that some nice older couple would see me walking aimlessly with my bags and offer to take me in for the night. This, of course, did not happen. I did manage to get a hotel manager to let me keep my bags behind his counter for a couple of hours so I could enjoy the New Year’s celebration before cuddling up inside a gutter for the night.

I walked in the direction away from the area I had spent the past hour walking around. I walked until I could hear fireworks and saw they were coming from just in front of me. I came to a large walkway next to the ocean with people and bars surrounding the area. I immersed myself into the crowd and watched the fireworks display. I have felt for a while that fireworks are such a primordial source of entertainment. It takes more to amuse me than a bunch of brightly colored flames and loud noises. I will admit that the fireworks succeeded in entertaining me and they even felt necessary for the occasion.

The fireworks stopped after the last ones that were sent up began falling on people in the crowd. People were running away, some screaming in terror and others laughing hysterically. Well, maybe they weren’t screaming in terror, but people looked a little concerned. There was a stage set up with a band that started playing music. The crowd made room so people could dance. I love Mexican dancing. I am a terrible dancer but I could do that and I think I would like it too. I walked around for an hour or two watching the people and the band. It was now 2am and I was exhausted after my day of travelling. It was also 4am for me since I had travelled from Ohio. Naturally, I got lost trying to find the hotel I left my bags at. I came upon a free standing, wooden bridge that crossed a river. It wasn’t the way I needed to go but I couldn’t pass up crossing it. All of the drunken people trying to cross it were jumping up and down on the bridge, falling over, and laughing. It looked great. I crossed the bridge and lost my balance from all the people jumping on it. I was sober and even I couldn’t cross the thing! I wandered around for about 20 minutes before I got my bearings back and found the hotel. I knew that it was a stretch to get the hotel manager to let me sleep in the lobby but I was confident I could talk him into it. There was no way I was going to sleep outside with all the drunken people screaming and bothering me while I try to sleep. I made myself appear as pathetic and helpless as I could to the manager. He resisted at first and then agreed to let me stay. I took out 100 pesos to thank him for his generosity. He put his hands up to stop me and refused to take the money. As soon as I placed the money on the counter, he quickly lowered his hands and consented to accepting the gift.

There was a computer in the lobby that I used for a little while before taking a seat at the table and laying my head in my arms to sleep. I heard somebody snoring and thought the manager was sleeping at his post. I looked up to see him playing solitaire on his computer and his son curled up in a sleeping bag beneath him snoring away. It was nice to not be the only one sleeping in that lobby. I woke up every hour during the night either to people entering the hotel or to change sleeping positions. My sleeping options were limited. I could either sit up in the chair with my legs propped on another chair or I could lay my head on my arms on the table. This sleeping arrangement would leave my back aching for several days.

At 7am the manager woke me up and told me it was time. I forgot that in persuading him the previous night, I told him I would leave at 7am. I picked up my bags and walked to the nice area by the ocean where I had watched the fireworks. I wondered what happened to Joe. Did he make it to Puerto Vallarta? I decided he probably stayed at the town he was in because he seemed disappointed in the last email I received from him when I told him I couldn’t book a room at the hostel. I sat on a rock in the early morning and watched felt the sun rise behind me as I looked out into the ocean. It felt great to be able to enjoy this beautiful, peaceful morning after the gigantic party that had taken place only a few hours prior. I noticed a large object moving in the water just out of range to view clearly. I locked my eyes on the object as it moved north, parallel to the land. I determined what it was when I saw a surge of water shoot out of the object. It was a small whale moving through the water. What a way to begin the New Year.

Meeting up with Joe

2008-01-10T13:07:00.000-08:00

I spent the morning trying to find a decent hotel for a good price. I settled on a place that had a great view from the roof for 400 pesos. I still had not heard from Joe so I sent him an email and told him I found a hotel but failed to mention the name or location of it. When I checked my email later that day, Joe had said to give him the name of the hotel or meet him at Señor Frog’s at 7pm. He also mentioned that he found the bar we were supposed to meet at the previous night and was there at 11:15pm. He said that he had a crazy night and ended up staying with a family at their house south of the city. His story is hilarious and completely insane. I wish he would write a blog for it but I'm sure he doesn't have the time. Anyway, I ended up missing him at the bar so I headed back to the hotel to find him waiting for me in the room. He said he just asked the cleaning lady to let him in and she did. We had a beer together and told each other our stories from the previous night.

We walked toward the most populated, or touristy, part of town to find a place to have a drink. The American bars looked like a Spring Break for 40-year-olds trying to relive their college days. We decided on a bar that had a balcony overlooking the water. They had 2 for 1 Coronas so we knew we couldn’t go wrong. We talked, drank some beers, and ate popcorn. The table behind us was filled with about 10 Americans being loud and obnoxious. The table next to us was where all the action was. There were 2 cute, very young Mexican girls sitting at a table with 2 men in their 40’s. Joe had his back to the table so he couldn’t see that the girls kept looking at us. I ignored it until it became too obvious. Every couple of minutes they would turn around and stare right in my eyes. I told Joe what was going on and we began to try to figure out the relationship between these young girls and the men. Since they had no shame in showing their interest in us we automatically assumed they were prostitutes. One of the men was always touching the girls and rubbing their legs. We figured out that they were businessmen and he had done this before. His buddy was a little timid so his friend knew the only way that he could get him to hook up with the prostitute was to get him drunk. They drank beer after beer after beer at that table. The girls didn’t seem to be drinking too much and would disappear to the bathroom for extended periods of time. This must have meant the old guys were giving them drugs, maybe cocaine to take in the bathroom. The guys became drunker and the girls kept their eyes on us. There were no smiles, just the look of determination. Maybe they were trying to add us to the list for the night. On one occasion Joe left for the bathroom and one of the girls followed immediately after him. I thought for sure something had happened. He said he didn’t even notice the girl but that there was a bunch of cocaine going around in the bathroom. I asked if one of the guy’s at the table was in on it and Joe said that the guy came in and saw it but was totally shocked by the scene. This didn’t make sense with our hypothesis. As the night progressed, we were both ready to go. However, I confessed that I couldn’t leave until we found out the truth of what was going on with this odd double date. By now, the two men were drunk and holding each other. They were crying and rubbing their heads together while calling each other “brother.” They were acting like classic drunks except for the rubbing of the heads and crying. The girls attention had now shifted to us. It appeared the guys had found their love for each other and the girls were moving on to us. Just then, a blonde girl with a fake tan from the American table came over to us with a bucket full of Pacifico beers. She said her table couldn’t drink the beers so she wanted to sell them to us. I thought it was a little absurd for her to try to sell us the beers rather than just give them away. We didn’t have as much as she was asking so she asked for whatever we had. We gave her some change which amounted to maybe 20 pesos. She told us she was from Chicago and was 25 years old. This is where I lost track of the conversation because I was busy trying to understand how she was only 25. Her face was worn and her hair was very dry and damaged like it had been dyed too much. She looked more like she was 25 going on 35. So there’s a message for you fake tanners and hair dyers. There’s a high price to pay for looking tan and blonde in January. The seemingly old lady left and realized that I didn’t want to drink any more beers. The Mexican girls had their eyes locked on my so I motioned for them to take a beer or two. This began the conversation. Joe started in with the Spanish and I was too far away to hear what was going on. At this time, another girl from the American table came over to give us our change back. She said that we could just have the beers and didn’t need to pay for them. She had a very nasal voice and used the word “like” too much. She too was very tan but looked more like she was 25 than the other girl…so maybe she was really 16. I listened to her life story and then caught the last part of Joe’s conversation with the Mexican girls as they were leaving. Suddenly, the younger looking one looked very innocent and not so much like a prostitute. Both girls hugged and kissed Joe and then ran over and hugged and kissed me before leaving with the men. Joe looked at me and confessed that our theory was a little off. The man that couldn’t keep his hands off the girls was their father and the shy one was their uncle. They hadn’t seen their uncle in a couple of years so they decided to go out and celebrate. They had lost a friend recently, which was why the men were crying and rubbing their heads together. It was all just an innocent family outing. Joe and I left the bar and walked back toward the hotel. As we were walking, we looked inside one of the bars to see the Americans we had just met dancing with balloons tied around their heads. They tried to get us to come in and join them but it just didn’t seem like it would be worth it for us.

Sayulita & San Blas

2008-01-10T13:05:00.000-08:00

Joe and I took a bus to Sayulita the following day. Sayulita is a small coastal town that was very crowded with tourists when we went. They beach was covered in people so we walked down until we found a trail that went into the jungle. We took a barefoot hike through the jungle until we came out at another beach that was deserted except for a couple of families. We spent the afternoon there, went back to town to have dinner, and took the bus back to Puerto Vallarta.

The next day Joe was flying back to Tucson so he wrote me out an itinerary to follow when I arrived in the small fishing village of San Blas. I also borrowed his Lonely Planet travel book to better navigate the area. This turned out to be an essential tool. I took a city bus to the bus terminal where I had to wait 3 hours for a bus to San Blas. The lady had to tell me the same thing about 3 times before I understood her. She hated me. The bus ride to San Blas was incredible. We rode through the jungle and every once in a while we would come out to a high point where to the right, you could see over the jungle and small farm houses for miles and to the left, you could see the ocean. I watched the sun set over the ocean just before the bus reached San Blas. I followed Joe’s recommendation to a cheap hotel to stay at and paid for a room for 200 pesos. I relaxed and watched Discovery Channel in Spanish for about an hour and then took a walk to explore the town. I walked through the main plaza which was more crowded than I would have expected. The plaza is right next to the bus station and is surrounded by restaurants and taco stands. I walked to the harbor and then made a loop back into town. I finished off the walk at the San Blas Social Club. Joe highly recommended that I visit this bar. It was very small and had a relaxed atmosphere. It was partially crowded and the people at the bar were engulfed in a conversation when I sat down so they didn’t take much notice of me at first. I hung out and drank a beer. As I was deciding if I would have another beer or leave, they guy next to me at the bar struck up a conversation with me. He was from San Diego and had just visited Tucson recently. It is strange to be in the middle of nowhere and meet someone that lives near you and knows your city. But that’s how it goes with travelers. When I was in Alaska, an older couple from Canada or someplace not only knew all about Tucson but also knew the exact small town that my friend, Barbara, is from in Switzerland. Anyway, Kyle told me he had hitch hiked with some friends down the Baja coast and took a ferry across the gulf of California before travelling up to San Blas. He confirmed part of Joe’s itinerary and said that I should go on the boat ride in La Tovara while I was in San Blas. After a while his friends took off and he followed. It was about 11pm and the bar was not almost empty. I took this as a hint to go back to my hotel so I could get up early and go to La Tovara.

I woke up early and after several failed attempts of finding some guy named Abraham to take me to La Tovara as Kyle had said to do, I just followed the Lonely Planet book and took a bus to Matanchen. I got off the bus right in front of the boat ride office. The workers tried charging me 300 pesos so I asked 2 older Canadian couples if I could join their boat and pay just 100 pesos. I lucked out and our guide spoke perfect English. He was a newcomer to the bird watching field and absolutely loved the trip he was taking us on. 2 young Dutch guys from Amsterdam joined our team and we were on our way. The boat ride was fantastic. It was exactly what I would think it is like to go for a boat ride in the Everglades, minus the boat with the big fan propelling it. We saw crocodiles, turtles, iguanas, and many different types of birds. We ended the ride at a Cocodrilario (crocodile hatchery). This is the largest crocodile hatchery in Mexico. They are working to restore the crocodile population that was once in Mexico before the crocodiles were hunted for their leather. It was neat to see the baby crocodiles and the enormous 60-year-old ones they had. Crocodiles don’t do much. They just sit there in the sun with their mouths open and stare. I was more interested in a stray katamundi that was wondering around. Our guide said he has seen the katamundi here before and suspects it may be a pet or something. The other katamundis they had were in large cages. They also had a few deer in cages. The one that was lose was walking around sniffing the dirt like an anteater, eating insects. It kept walking in between my legs and showed that it wasn’t afraid of humans. It was a young animal and had a fluffy tail. I held off touching it as long as I could but I knew I had to do it. I mean, look at the picture. Look at that fluffy tail! I bent down and pet it’s surprisingly coarse fur. It immediately stood up on two feet and started hissing and clawing at me. I jumped back as the katamundi attacked. The Canadians and Dutch people from the boat thought this was hysterical. We boarded the boat and our guide passed out beers and sodas to everyone for the ride back.

I was curious to find out what everyone else from the boat was going to do next in San Blas. The Canadians were staying outside of San Blas so they had rented a shuttle for the day and were heading on seeing the old Spanish fort in San Blas. The Dutch guys were planning to go to a small beach called Playa de los Cocos to spend the day and night. I shared at taxi back with the Dutch guys and told them I had planned to go to that beach sometime as well. They invited me along and told me to bring my bags because they planned to spend the night. We bought our bus tickets for the beach and split up to check out of our hotels. I got my bags and stopped at restaurant to get a burrito for the bus ride. I made it to the bus station just when the bus was supposed to leave. I boarded the bus and saw the Dutch guys were not there yet. Just before the bus departed, they showed up. Their names were Manno and Rueben and they were 18 and 19 years old. They had both spent a few weeks in Guadalajara studying Spanish before heading to Puerto Vallarta where they met at a hostel. Surprisingly, they did not know each other prior to coming to Mexico. It also turned out that they stayed at the hostel that I wanted to stay at when I was in Puerto Vallarta. I was unable to make reservations online and the hostel never returned my emails. I called to find out if there were rooms available but the number did not work. From this, I concluded that the hostel was no longer there, just as Bar Amsterdam no longer existed. They Dutch guys even told me there was plenty of room at the hostel on New Year’s Eve. You can imagine my frustration.

We checked into a cheap hotel directly on the beach for 100 pesos each. There were only two beds so the owner brought a mattress and sheet. We ended up drawing cards for the beds. Of course, I drew the lowest card and had to sleep on the mattress. We had a drink at a restaurant overlooking the beach and then walked down to the beach. They brought a soccer ball with them and as soon as we reached the beach, 3 young Mexican teenagers ran up and asked us to play 3 on 3. We played for a while and an audience of children and young Mexican teenagers gathered on the sidelines to cheer on the white boys. My foot began hurting more and more as we played. Eventually, I stopped to look at it and noticed it was gushing blood. We called time and the teenage girls came running to my aide. I sat on the beach as they scrubbed the open would on my foot with a lime. It hurt like hell and I made it seem worse than it was because the girls got a kick out of it. I had to leave the game so I went for a swim in the ocean. The water was surprisingly warm. It wasn’t cold it all. I looked at my foot and saw that a callus on the bottom of my foot had torn.

We ate dinner at one of the best Mexican restaurants I have ever eaten at. It was a small place on the beach connected to a family’s house. All of the food was prepared by the mother and grandmother. We had hand breaded fish with rice, beans, and tortillas. We talked to an old Canadian that went on and on. He had visited this area 10 years ago and came back to see if any of his old friends were still there. I will remind you that we were on a small beach with just few hotels around, nothing else. He was a strange fellow. We bought beers at the only place that sold beers in the town. They beer distributor ran his operation out of his bedroom/kitchen/store. It was one room that performed all of these functions simultaneously. We played cards under the ramada on the beach at our hotel. The old Canadian happened to be there so he joined in too. I had told the Dutch guys about the popular American drinking game, Asshole, and they just had to play. Rueben liked the idea that he could become president and really soaked it up when he was the president, saluting those lower in rank to him and all. Manno left to go to sleep after a while, which left Reuben, the old Canadian, and me. At one point the old Canadian was going on about how all that he believed in was all around him. He pointed to the trees, the ocean, the birds, etc. He then flicked his cigarette into the ocean. I was quick to call him out on this hypocrisy. He looked down sullenly and pleaded that he was drunk.

The next morning I awoke before the Dutch guys so I walked out to the ramada to take in the scenery. They wanted to stay another night at the beach, but there was still more for me to see in San Blas. I woke the guys up and said goodbye. I ate breakfast at that excellent family restaurant where the lady told me that I did not look American. She said that my complexion and clothes were not fitting of an American. I told her I was of Irish decent but I didn’t know how to say “Ireland” in Spanish. She would name a country and I would say if it was north, east, south, or west but she didn’t realize there was a country in between Iceland and Britain. I flagged a bus down that was headed to San Blas. It just so happened that the old Canadian was on the same bus. I went back to the same hotel I had stayed in and even got my same room back. I left my bags in the room and walked through a large outdoor market that was a big attraction every Saturday. I eventually made it to the harbor where I took a boat across the water to an island called Isla del Rey. The island was like Jurassic Park. There were reptiles everywhere! I saw huge iguanas all over the place, little lizards, and I think I even spotted a snake. I hiked around the island and lay on the beach for a while. When I wanted to return, I walked to the beach I had been dropped off at and waved to the guy across the water for him to come get me. I couldn’t imagine spending 10 pesos any better.

Next, I hiked up to the highest point in San Blas to an old Spanish fort known as El Fuerte. Unfortunately a fog had rolled in from the water so I didn’t get to see much of a view. Go figure, the only time it was cloudy the whole trip was when I decided to check out a good view. I thought about heading to the bus station that night and starting my way back to Tucson early but I had already booked my room so I decided to stay. In retrospect, I wish I would have left then.

The Arduous Journey Home

2008-01-10T12:11:00.000-08:00

I decided to start my travel day off slowly. I lay around and watched television for an hour or two before having breakfast. Oh, I forgot to mention that there was soft-core porn on a majority of the channels the night before. Is it normal for Mexican children to be exposed to that so easily? Maybe most of them don’t have cable. Yeah, probably not. The bus to Tepic left every hour so I figured I would take the 10:00am bus and get to Tepic just before noon. I was sure there would be a bus going to Tucson around noon. The plan seemed to work out well. There was no bus that went directly to Tucson so I booked a ticket to Nogales (on the border of Arizona) at 1:30pm. I checked my bags behind a cashier and went out side to stock up on food from the fruit stands for the trip. I arrived back at the bus station just after 1 to see that my bus had arrived. I got my bags and began to board the bus. I got midway up the stairs when I heard the driver yelling at me from outside to get off the bus. I thought that he must be cleaning the bus and I boarding it too early. I also noticed a Mexican woman with her 4 children and bags waiting to board the bus. Just before 1:30pm, the driver boarded the bus. I stood up and picked up my bags as the driver backed up the bus and took off. A Mexican woman ran up beside me screaming and cursing the driver but he didn’t stop. This woman and the one with the children got a hold of a manager and went nuts. The screamed, pleaded, and pointed to me and explained my story for me. They made a few references to me so they must have thought that an American getting screwed would make a good point in their case. The manager led us to his office along with another fat Mexican who kept silent as I did while the women went to work. There was a lot of fast talking so I really had no idea what was happening. It ended up that I was to be put on a bus headed for Tijuana that left at 2:30pm. As I was waiting outside, the Mexican lady with all the children began talking to me. She spoke as much English as I spoke Spanish so we were able to somewhat communicate. She told me she had a beautiful daughter that was 20 and liked Gringos. She was quick to add that Americans weren’t for her. She insisted that she get my email address for her daughter. She also pointed out that her daughter was a bitch in every sense of the word. A few examples of how stubborn her daughter is left me no better word to use. She also added that her daughter doesn’t like to bath. I couldn’t believe it. This was exactly what I was looking for: a girl who lives 1,500 miles away, doesn’t speak English, is very bitchy, and doesn’t bath. As I was planning my wedding date, the bus arrived.

I sat next to the fat Mexican that missed the last bus and was heading to Nogales as I was. He mumbled and didn’t put much effort into trying to understand my Spanish so we had a lot of one word conversations. It’s only fair that I would get the only broken seat on the bus as well. The seat didn’t recline so I prepared myself for 24 hours of sitting straight up. Just as we started to leave, all of the Mexican woman’s children were screaming and yelling at me and pointing out the window. I looked out and there was the Mexican woman with her daughter. The whole bus erupted and everyone was cheering and making me wave and blow kisses to my future wife. My darling was standing out there with her arms crossed and a very moody look on her face. She was exactly as her mother had described and was in no mood for the public humiliation she was forced to endure. It was great.

The bus played a wide range of movies. They ranged from old Mexican classics to new movies like Bewitched in English with Spanish subtitles. I even got to watch the hitcher, which was one of the worst movies I have ever seen. It’s right up there with Cellular. The bus stopped every hour or two and I would get out and stretch my legs and eat a taco or two. I noticed that I was being watched at each stop. There was this Mexican teenage girl that had her eye on me. The fat Mexican had brought my confidence with the Spanish language down by saying he couldn’t understand me so I didn’t humor the girl and talk to her. I could only ignore her for so long. She eventually came over and spoke decent English. She was the only one on the bus that could speak any English. She was kind of an awkward girl but it was nice to talk to her. She seemed a little crazy. She was talking to her mom after one of our conversations so I ducked into a restaurant to grab napkins for the road. As I was gathering the napkins I watched out of the corner of my eye as she jumped into the doorway to see where I went and then jumped back to her mother to continue her conversation. She would tap me on the shoulder or something every time she got on or off the bus. The people around me took notice of all this. At one point, I was looking in my Spanish dictionary to find how to ask her a question and the fat Mexican held the book up and everyone applauded my effort with her. On several occasions after she would walk by he would put his hands up to trace her ass and say, “muy grande.” I would elbow him in the side and say, “te gusto.” He loved it. I tried to tell him she was only 15 but he didn’t seem to care. I also had a crew of Mexican children that would hang around me. They would always walk by and smile and one little guy would offer me cookies. Mexican children are so great. And this is how the bus ride went for the next 20 hours.

We finally got to a place where I was forced to leave the bus. I hoped we were at Nogales but I wasn’t so lucky. My 15-year-old girlfriend told me that I had to get on another bus for Nogales. She put her hand out to shake mine and I gave her a hug instead. I let the fat Mexican take care of all the details for arranging our new bus. We were on the previous bus for 25 hours! The trip should have only taken 21 or 22 hours but the driver thought it was necessary to talk his face off everything the bus stopped. The fat Mexican liked to say, “Habla grande.”

The new bus was terrific because my seat actually reclined! The ride was only 1.5 hours so there wasn’t much bonding with the patrons of this bus. When we got to Nogales I shook fatty’s hand and said goodbye. I found that there were no buses to Tucson but I would have to take a shuttle instead. This option had never occurred to me because I thought it was expensive. I had no other options so I paid a taxi 70 pesos to take me about 2 miles to the border. A little pricey for Mexico, but I didn’t know what else to do. I walked across the border and a man walked me to the shuttle place. The shuttle was just $10 and left in 15 minutes. If only the rest of the trip home could have been that smooth! Paul, my neighbor, had locked himself out of his side of the house so he was very happy to pick me up where the shuttle dropped me off. I made it home at 9pm, which makes the total duration of my trip home a consecutive 35 hours. I took a shower and collapsed into my sweet, comfortable bed. The next morning I woke up with a paralyzing cold and was not able to move for 2 days. Ah, Mexico…

Thanksgiving 2007 - San Carlos, Sonora, Mexico

2007-11-26T15:38:00.000-08:00

Intro: My buddy, Karl, and I spent Thanksgiving weekend in San Carlos, Sonora, Mexico. We had originally planned to take a ferry from Guaymas to Santa Rosalía and then hitch down to Mulege, however the ferry schedule constantly fluctuates and we wouldn’t have had enough time to make the trip happen. I visited San Carlos in February and knew it would be pretty easy to get there and spend a few days kayaking and drinking margaritas on the beach.

Día Uno: The Bus Ride

The trip could not have started out more Mexican. I have taken the 11:00pm bus from TBC Conexión in Tucson into Mexico for the past 2 years and have not had a problem getting a seat. When we arrived at the bus station we were told that all the seats were taken and we would have to wait until morning for the next bus. Karl looked disappointed and I could tell that he didn’t want to take ‘no’ for an answer. My neighbors, Paul and Philippe, had dropped us off and stuck around just in case there was a problem. They told us that they had to go meet someone but would come back and pick us up if we needed a ride. Before leaving, Paul offered a word of advise saying that in Mexico anything is possible and a full bus doesn’t mean that we can’t still get a ride. The lady behind the counter was not being very helpful so we walked outside and talked to the bus driver and a few other “workers.” I put quotation marks around the word “workers” because I have no idea if these guys worked for the bus company or were just hanging around and felt like helping us out. Anyway, these workers and the bus driver promised to check the bus for open seats after the bus was loaded. While people were boarding the bus, Karl and I stood to the side and noticed that they were having trouble with the bus stalling. It would run for about 5 minutes and stall. This was not of our concern yet because we needed to get on the bus before we could worry if the bus would even make it to Mexico. We were told that there may be 2 seats available, then they said there may be 1 seat, then they said one of us could sit in the front alley and one could sit in the back alley, then they said the front alley was taken and we would have to sit in the back…but we were in; we were allowed to ride. Although we had to sit on the floor, we were still told to purchase tickets and they promised us a seat when we got to Nogales. 45 minutes on the floor didn’t sound too bad to us.

We found ourselves sitting on the floor directly above the engine so the floor got really warm and we were miserable and uncomfortable. Did I mention that the bathroom is located in the back of the bus? Well, it is. Each time a person went into the bathroom Karl and I would automatically give each other a look of horror knowing that at any one of those people were capable of turning our miserable seating into hell. We were not even outside the parking lot when the bus stalled for the first time. It then stalled at each light on the road. It even stalled while we were driving down I-19 toward Nogales. Most of the time the driver would shift the bus into neutral and start it while coasting down the highway but sometimes he would have to pull over to repeatedly turn the key until the engine turned over. I had no doubt in my mind that we were not going to even make it to Mexico, let alone 7 additional hours to Guaymas with the bus in this condition. We drove like this for 45 minutes until the driver pulled into a gas station to add water to the radiator. The bus worked flawlessly all the way to Guaymas after this. As promised, Karl and I were upgraded to genuine padded seats in Nogales. It was a rough start but the trip had finally started.

Día Dos: Arriving in San Carlos (Thanksgiving Day)

We arrived in Guaymas at about 6:00am the following morning. I think we both slept a total of 3 hours but we were excited to get off the bus and didn’t feel too tired. As soon as we stepped off the bus, taxi drivers swarmed us to try to give us a ride to San Carlos. I knew that there was a city bus that would take us there but wasn’t sure of the hours. I walked into the bus station and used broken Spanish to ask where I could find a bus to San Carlos. The lady said to just take a taxi. Rather than wander around looking for the bus, we agreed to pay $20 for the taxi. The taxi took us to the cheapest hotel he knew of in San Carlos. The hotel was locked so we walked across the street to have breakfast at Jax Snacks. After breakfast, we transferred our money to pesos at the bank. Next, I talked Karl into splurging and paying $20 each for a nice room at Los Jitos and having an ocean view. Also, we were allowed to check in at 6:00am to take showers and rest. It felt good to wash off the dirty feeling of spending a night on the bus.

After resting for only about an hour, Karl saw a sign for scooters and had to check it out. As luck would have it, there were only 2 scooters available in all of San Carlos and one of them was broken. There was no way we were going to ride down the street spooning each other while all the Mexican whistled at us so we tried to get a deal on renting a scooter and ATV but couldn’t get a good price. We decided to just walk down the street and rent bicycles for the day for $15. You are probably thinking that we had to pay high prices for Mexican standards. This is due to the fact that San Carlos is becoming a very popular place for Americans to go. They are also in the process of building a 72 hole golf course and resort that will raise prices even more, destroy the small town culture, but ultimately bring money to the economy. So I guess it balances out…I don’t know.

We rode the bikes to the marinaterra where I knew Fernando, a local guy I met on my last trip to San Carlos, that could give us a list of activities to do. Fernando told us he would give us a deal on kayaks and snorkels if we came back the next morning. He also said he would take us for a tour of the area and to some remote beaches. This sounded like a good deal to us so we agreed to return the next morning. We left the marinaterra and decided to relax and have a margarita. We found a cantina with an outdoor patio and televisions broadcasting American football. The place was a local hotspot for gringos (Americans). The margaritas were really strong so naturally, we thought they were delicious. We talked to a few other tables and met people from Texas and Flagstaff, AZ. We practiced our Spanish on the waitresses and they told us to visit their friends that were across the street serving turkey to people. We paid our bill and then stood in line to see what this turkey business was all about. They had prepared deep-fried turkey with mashed potatoes and pumpkin pie. We were also given free beers to drink while waiting in line. What more could you ask for on Thanksgiving? We ate our free meal, which was delectable, and took another beer each for the road. The drinks in the afternoon sun brought on a welcomed buzz but also made us extremely tired. We still had 4 hours left to use the bikes but chose to return them early so we could take a nap and not have to worry about returning the bikes. We returned the bikes and walked back to Los Jitos to crash.

Before taking a nap, we tried to find the pool so we could go for a quick swim. The pool was in the condos next to the hotel and the water was dirty and freezing cold. We were told there was a water slide near the pool so we walked around until we found it. The water there was cold too but I was willing to go down the slide anyway. I climbed to the top of the slide only to notice that the water was turned off and there was a sign saying it was closed. I retreated back down the stairs and laid down on top of a picnic table under a ramada with a palm leave roof. Karl went back to the hotel to get a massage while I fell asleep on the table. I slept for about an hour and walked back to the hotel room. Karl was still getting a massage so I fell asleep on the bed.

I woke up and saw Karl sleeping in the other bed. It was dark outside so I figured that we slept for 3 or 4 hours. I went onto the balcony to check out the view and saw a little cat, no more than 6 months old sitting on my porch. She was very affectionate so I pet her for a few minutes and then let her follow me into the room. I poured some water in the ash tray for her and then let her lay with me on the bed until Karl woke up. Karl woke up, looked at the cat, and acted like it was completely normal. It was quite the reaction I had expected. I put the cat outside and we left the hotel to go out for a drink. I suggested a bar that I knew had a pool table. Karl drank another margarita and I had a beer while we played a game of pool. After the game of pool, we left to eat some tacos at a taco stand. We ordered caramelos and joked in broken English and Spanish with the two men that worked at the taco stand. They told us that the night life in San Carlos doesn’t happen until after 11:00pm. They were also quick to point out the one strip club in the town. It was only 9:00pm and Karl and I didn’t think we would be able to make it until 11:00pm so we said goodbye to our new friends and walked back to the hotel and watched some strange movie that had random segments of cartoons intertwined with the story’s plot. It’s an American movie, but we were both really confused by it. We made it an early night because we felt we needed the rest.

Día Tres: Kayaking and Snorkeling

We woke up around 8:00am, checked out of the hotel, and went to Jax Snacks for breakfast. In fact, I ate there for breakfast every day of the trip. After breakfast, we walked across the street to find out the price of the hotel the taxi driver took us to the previous day. The hotel didn’t look very nice and they wanted 500 pesos per night. We kept walking down the street until we came across a run-down hotel sign. We walked around the property and it was apparent that the place was no longer a hotel. As we started to walk away, a fat Mexican guy came out of nowhere and started talking to him. We asked him about the hotel in broken Spanish. He said he didn’t work there but would call the lady who ran the place. He got her on the phone and handed it to me. She spoke English so I asked her how much the room was. She wanted 500 pesos so I told her that was too much and got her down to 700 pesos for 2 nights. She was on her way from Guaymas and would be there in 30 minutes. We walked around to waste time until Ms. Vasquez arrived. She showed us a room and it looked better than we had expected. It had a living room, kitchen, bedroom, and bathroom. We tried to talk her down on the price again to no avail so I paid her the 700 pesos. She said she was going back to Guaymas and would bring pillows for us later. If we were not at the room, she said she would leave the pillows with the man who ran the taco stand next door, Checke (or “Checkers” as I nicknamed him). We went back in the hotel to put our bags down and started to notice all the problems with the room. The first thing we noticed was that the television didn’t work. I ran outside and told Ms. Vasquez and she promised to bring a new television with the pillows. After that, she pulled away in her car and left. We also noticed that there were no towels, soap, or toilet paper in the room. There was also a colony of ants living in the bathroom and the window in the living room was broken and someone could easily reach their hand through the glass to open the window and break in to the room. I told Karl of my previous hotel horror stories in Mexico to calm him down. I told him of the hotel room that had two beds and a toilet in the middle of the room. I also told him about the time I slept on a cement floor in an abandoned restaurant building on a beach and woke up to a stray dog nursing her puppies next to me. After this, Karl felt fortunate to have such a luxurious hotel room. We walked outside and met Joel, who was living next door to us. Joel was a skinny guy of about 35 years with a shaved head. He wore tattered clothes and sunglasses that covered most of his face. He said he had been staying there for over a month and offered us a towel and shampoo. We talked to him for a little while and then left to go kayaking and snorkeling.

We took the bus to the marinaterra where we met Fernando to rent kayaks and snorkels. Fernando was moving really slowly that day and appeared to have had a rough night. I can only imagine what he got himself into. Actually, having gone out for a night with Fernando the last time I was in San Carlos I can guess exactly what he got himself into. We talked about getting a two person kayak but Fernando told us the y are for “girlfriends” and it wouldn’t be right. He also said if we get single kayaks he will let us stay out all day as opposed to coming back after 1 hour. We couldn’t pass that deal up.

The sky was clear but in the distance there were black clouds heading directly for us. I told Fernando it looked like it was going to rain and he assured me it wouldn’t. I was a little skeptical when I noticed he was silently laughing to himself as he loaded the kayaks. As we were loading our kayaks with our gear, we watched to young Mexicans that worked at the resort try to paddle off together in a single kayak. They were both fully clothed and must have fallen into the water 4 times before getting balanced in the kayak. After our gear was loaded, we shoved off and headed for a cave that you can kayak through to the other side. We paddled around to several of these caves as the sky began to turn black above us. After about 15 minutes the sky cleared and it was sunny again. Fernando was actually right about the weather. We docked the kayaks by a small island that Fernando told us was a great area for snorkeling. The island was coated white from all of the herons and pelicans that enjoy defecating on it. The smell was horrendous. We made sure we were downwind from the island and jumped in the water. The water was a little chilly but not as bad as you would expect it to be in late November. We snorkeled around the island and in all the little caves and crevices. We saw a lot of sea urchins, star fish, and brightly colored fish. This was actually my first experience snorkeling in the ocean. It was terrific. It is an amazing experience to slowly float through the turquoise water and view all of the life under the water. I may look into getting my scuba license.

The water became too cold to continue snorkeling in after about 15 minutes. We got back in the kayaks and paddled to a different area to snorkel in. We found a really cool cave with a small, rocky beach that was the perfect size to hold our kayaks. The area wasn’t as good as the first so we didn’t spend too much time in it. In total, we only spent about 2 or 3 hours kayaking and snorkeling before heading back to shore.

We walked to a small taco stand and each ate a few tacos de cabeza. I promised myself I would stay away from these kinds of tacos on this trip but I just couldn’t resist them. It was all downhill at the taco stands after this. I found myself eating tacos I was unable to translate to find out what was in them. I just dove in and ordered practically anything and everything. After filling ourselves full of “face” tacos we took the bus back to the hotel.

We took showers and both had to use the towel that Joel had lent us. I was not surprised to find that the towel smelled like it had been soaked in marijuana smoke. After we were clean and dressed, we walked to a restaurant to get something to eat. I suggested a really nice place called “Charlie’s Rock” that is located right on the beach with a great view of the bay. The place was further than I had expected so it took us a while to get there. We sat facing the ocean and ordered margaritas, fish tacos, and guacamole dip. The margaritas and dip were delicious. After lunch, we walked across the street to the bus stop and noticed it was located directly in front of an ice cream place. We went inside and Karl ordered a chocolate chip milkshake and I got a cookies ‘n cream cone. It was also delicious. We ate the ice cream until the bus came to take us back to the hotel.

Once we arrived back at the hotel, we went next door to see what Joel was up to. He was still sitting on his couch and there were two other kids of about 20 years old with him. They were both Mexican and only one of them spoke English. He introduced himself as Andres and said he lived with Joel. He came across as the most laid back person I have ever met. He talked real low and a very low key demeanor. He didn’t seem like he was ever really happy or really sad, he just was. I immediately liked him. I watched as him and his friend smoked a small bowl before leaving for work. He gave us a Mexican handshake and took off for work. A Mexican handshake is a term I use to call how friends in Mexico shake hands. I have seen both kids and adults shake hands this way. They slap hands once and then hit their fists together. I guess you could also call it a “slap rock” but I think Mexican handshake sounds more formal.

Karl and I hung out with Joel for a while longer and learned his whole life story. Joel went on about how he is originally from Chicago, has travelled around since he was 16 years old, started a successful brokerage in NYC, lived in San Diego and San Francisco, and so on. He talked a lot. He also drank a lot of Tecate. It seems like all the Americans living in San Carlos drink a lot, talk a lot, and don’t do a lot. Joel told us that he was planning on starting up a Juice Bar once he finds a financial backer. I got to know him pretty well and noticed that he is a very personable guy and people seem to like him so I bet he succeeds in starting his Juice Bar. As I was saying before, we listened to Joel talk for quite a while and watched movies on his television since ours was broken. Joel told us that he was low on funds and Andres needed a place to live so he took him in as a roommate. I commented on what a great roommate he must be and Joel agreed. He said that Andres has a naturally low key demeanor that is complimented by constant pot smoking and mescaline. He pointed to a basket full of cactus branches that Andres used to make mescaline. He also said that he has told Andres that he sounds very depressed when he speaks on the phone and sometimes thinks he should as what is wrong. Andres replied that most of his friends say the same thing and they tell him that he should stop smoking so much weed.

A few hours passed and we told Joel of a shrimp cook-off going on at the marinaterra. Joel had stated that he wasn’t going to go out that night but he said he would come along with us anyway. He offered to drive us in his Bronco but warned us that it would probably break down. He had lent it to a friend to take home and fix but he didn’t think that his friend had worked on it. The Bronco reminded me of a truck I had road around in when I was in Baja California last year. The back cab of the Bronco had been removed so it looked like a truck only there was nothing separating the front cab from the back end, it was all open. If I ever live in Mexico, I will own a vehicle like this. Karl sat in the front and I volunteered to sit in the back. We made it about 1 kilometer down the road before the Bronco broke down for the first time. We started it up and moved 10 feet more before the engine shut off. We continued on like this about 20 times until we were able to pull behind a bus stop and park the vehicle. We were within walking distance of the marinaterra and knew we could take the bus back if the Bronco didn’t start up after the party.

The party was set up in the outdoor pool/bar area of a beautiful resort. There was a mariachi band playing by the pool and free wine being served. We helped ourselves to couple glasses of wine and checked out the scene. All of the people at the resort were older white people. Joel said the event was probably an attempt to lure people into staying at the resort since it was new and not many people came to it. There was a stage set up with a dozen chefs fully dressed with the big white hats and everything preparing shrimp. There were also cameras all over broadcasting the event on big screens and probably on cable television. As exciting as all this sounds, it wasn’t at all. We finished our glasses of wine and departed. As you can expect, when we returned to the Bronco it didn’t start. We walked into a nearby gas station to purchase a couple of beers to drink while we waited for the bus. The bus came after a few minutes and took us back to our rundown hotel. We went back to Joel’s to hang out, drink beers, and watch movies.

We stayed at Joel’s until about 9:00pm and then walked to the bar where his roommate, Andres, was working. The bar was set in a courtyard that had palm trees that were illuminated with lights. It was a really pretty set up. We met the owner and found all the workers sitting at a couple of tables, drinking beer and cocktails. Naturally, we joined them. Karl was addicted to margaritas at this point so that’s what he ordered and I ordered a draft of some type of local Mexican beer. It was dark brown in color and tasted really good. Karl and I talked to a woman that was originally from Tucson and was not working as a teacher outside of San Carlos. We talked to her about Tucson, San Carlos, scuba diving, and speaking Spanish. It was a really good conversation. Andres made a low key appearance here and there as he worked. I asked Andres where he was from and he said Guaymas. I told him that he talks different from most people and almost sounds like he has an accent. A later discussion with Joel revealed that he talks very low and doesn’t accentuate words like most Mexicans. He even talks low key- what a guy.

After a few failed attempts to drag Joel away from his conversations, everyone headed their own way and so did the three of us (Joel, Karl, and me). We walked to a bar called “Froggy’s” where, I noticed on my previous trip to San Carlos, most of the tourists hang out. Joel assured me that the crowd changes throughout the night and I will see that it is a cool place. We ordered a pitcher of beer and wrote our names down on the pool list while Joel wandered around the bar talking to everyone. The place was pretty crowded so it took Karl and I a few minutes before we were able to grab an empty table to sit down at. We began talking to some people at a table next to ours when I was told it was my turn at the pool table. I continued the conversation I was having until I couldn’t hold out any longer and was drug away to the pool table. I was going to have Karl play on my team but Joel said I waited too long and had to play with a Mexican guy. The Mexican spoke no English at all but I was able to communicate with him using my broken Spanish that had been developing more and more as the trip progressed. I didn’t shoot very well at first so the Mexican guy had to make most of the shots. I don’t remember the Mexican guy’s name but I do remember he was with his brother, Ricardo. I managed to pull myself together at the end of the game to make the final two shots to win the game. Ricardo’s brother screamed with excitement and ran over to congratulate me. We were now best friends. The next guy up was a heavy-set bald American guy that was wearing a really cheesy shirt that said “big dog.” He also acted arrogant so I instantly didn’t like him. I shook hands with him and conversed briefly but was not impressed at all with him. I joked with Ricardo’s brother about him and referred to him as “perro grande.” Ricardo’s brother thought this was the funniest thing he had ever heard. We annihilated Perro Grande and took no mercy on the next set of victims either. Ricardo’s brother and I were on a role. We continued on for what seemed like hours drinking beers, laughing, and destroying everyone that played us. Every once in a while, Karl would appear and fill my glass with beer or hand me a new bottle.

The bar was getting ready to close and Ricardo and his brother had to leave. They said goodbye and left me alone to find a new partner. I wanted to ask Karl to play but he was all the way across the bar talking to people so I was paired with an older girl in Perro Grande’s group of friends. She was as equally unimpressive as Perro Grande. She also sucked at pool and lost the game for us. It was probably a ploy of Perro Grande’s to come out the winner in the end so I let him have his day and returned to Karl and his new friends. We sat there and talked while the band played. At one point, the band started to play a song that I was familiar with and apparently, everyone in the bar was familiar with as well. The song was “Borracho y Loco” by an Argentinean band known as Enanitos Verdes. I didn’t know that Mexicans knew this song too and was overwhelmed with excitement. It was great to hear the band play the song while everyone in the bar, including me, sang along. The bar came to a close soon after the song was over and everybody was kicked out. Karl told me that Joel had left about an hour earlier so he and I began walking back to the hotel. We walked past a strip club called “Horse Black” and I told Karl that it was probably the only place that is still open. We decided it would be a good idea to go in and have one last drink. We refused to pay the 20 peso cover charge since it was so late and the bouncer agreed and let us in for free. There was a small Mexican guy with him that ran up to me and exclaimed that he knew me. He followed Karl and me into the club and sat down at our table going on about how he knew me. He tried to figure out how he knew me but never came up with a reasonable answer. We ordered a beer each and gave this guy, Louis, one too. Somewhere in the conversation, Louis talked Karl into buying me a lap dance. When the smoking hot Mexican girl grabbed me by the hand to lead me upstairs, there was no way I could refuse. It was late and I don’t think she was really feeling up to giving me a lap dance but she did a nice job anyhow. She led me back to the table and the three of us left soon after.

Louis followed us as we made our way back toward the hotel. He insisted on bringing girls to our hotel the next morning and asked how many we wanted. I decided to humor him and told him that I needed a minimum of 3 girls just for me. He laughed but took me seriously and told me how much it would cost. Then he went on bothering Karl about it. As we got closer to our hotel, I became annoyed with Louis and didn’t want him knowing where we were staying. I told him in an angry but not violent way that he needed to forget about bring us whores in the morning and get the hell away from us. He went back to bother Karl and I snuck away down a side street. When I got to the hotel I realized that Karl had the key. Fortunately, I remembered the hole in the window where the room had been broken into before. I slid my hand through the glass and unlocked the window. I then easily managed to climb through the window, over the refrigerator, and landed safely in the room. I thought about going back out to save Karl but had no idea where he and Louis had trailed off so I fell onto the bed and slept.

Día Quatro: To Stay or Not To Stay

The next morning I woke up thinking about what might have happened to Karl since he was not in the bed next to mine. I brushed my teeth and lay in bed listening to music thinking of what may have happened. After an hour or so, I walked into the living room and found Karl sleeping on the spare bed. I asked him if he wanted to get breakfast and he said he did but was too tired to get up right away. I went on to Jax Snacks to have breakfast by myself. After breakfast, I walked across the street and walked on the beach for a short while before returning to the hotel.

I asked Karl what he and Louis did after I left. He said that he tried to ditch Louis a couple of times but Loius kept catching him and reeling him back in. He wandered around with Louis until they came to a house where Louis said he knew someone but the person wasn’t home so he and Louis slept on that person’s porch. He said he slept for about an hour, then woke up and left Louis asleep on the porch. Karl also mentioned that somewhere in the story, he found a cool cat that followed him around. I was real sad that I missed out on sleeping on a random person’s porch but didn’t feel it was the end of the world.

I had a slight headache and although Karl said he felt fine, he wasn’t moving around too fast either. We hung around the hotel for a while thinking of what to do with the day. We were supposed to meet up with a guy that worked at a scuba rental to go out on a boat for free but slept through the meeting time so that was out of the question. Karl realized he was out of money and hinted at going back to Tucson. We came up with a plan to go to the gas station to find out the bus schedule, get breakfast for Karl, and get more ice cream. We had a lady at the gas station call the bus station in Guaymas to find out when the bus left toward Tucson. She said there was only one bus that left at 9:00pm. I told Karl that it must be a mistake and that I was sure there would be another one before then. We went to a breakfast place that Joel had suggested we go to but Karl decided he wanted fish tacos instead. Karl ordered one taco de pescado and I ordered one taco de camarón to tide me over since I had already eaten. The tacos were breaded and deep-fried and Karl thought they were amazing so he ordered two more. After the tacos, we continued on with our schedule and got more ice cream and then returned to the hotel room to pack. We had already paid for another night so I started thinking that maybe I would stay another night while Karl went back. I told Karl this as we walked toward the bus stop but he persuaded me to come to Guaymas with him anyway to check out when the bus leaves. When the bus arrived, the driver got out and lifted the hood to show that the bus was no longer functioning. This was our third vehicle that ceased to work on our trip. What luck, we thought. The next bus that came was packed full of people so we had to stand the whole way to Guaymas. This only got worse as we continued to pull over to pick up more people. We were crammed at the back of the bus while more people filled in so I couldn’t see where we were going. I heard people start groaning and laughing as we slowed down to pick up more people. I looked out the window and saw no less than 20 people waiting at the bus stop! We were crammed in even tighter as all of these people loaded onto the bus. The Mexicans had a great sense of humor about the situation and laughed and joked the whole ride.

When we arrived in Guaymas, I didn’t remember where to get off the bus to find the bus station so we got off at a spot in the middle of the city. We asked a lady where we could find the bus terminal and followed her directions. Her directions were wrong so we walked over one more street and found the bus terminal. The bus station confirmed that there was just one bus at 9:00pm. We talked to an American, wearing a touristy Hermosillo hat that was working on a laptop in the bus terminal. He told us that we could take a bus to Hermosillo and find a bus there that would take us to Tucson before 9:00pm. We decided, instead, to take a bus back to San Carlos and wait for the 9:00pm bus. I told Karl that I would take the 9:00pm bus with him back to Tucson rather than stay in San Carlos.

We took the bus back to our hotel and went next door to see what Joel was up to. He was laying under a blanket on his couch watching a movie on television. He looked comfortable so we told him we were going to get tacos and we would be back to join him. We went next door to Checke’s stand and ordered a couple chicken tostados. The tostados were loaded with chicken, avocado, cabbage, some type of sauce, and feta cheese. They were outstanding. I ordered one more and Karl ordered 3 more! Checke only charged us 10 pesos for each tostado, which must have been a discount because he should have charged way more than that.

When we returned to Joel’s room, he was drinking a beer (of course) so I brought a few beers over with me to drink while we watched movies. We watched Once Upon a Time in Mexico and Forrest Gump until it was time to leave to catch our bus in Guaymas. Joel walked with us toward the bus stop so that he could stop in to the bar that Andres worked at so he could see what the plan for the night was. There was going to be a very big party at the bar and Joel was going to set up an area to paint portraits for people. Karl and I stopped in for a few minutes, then exchanged goodbyes with the people we knew and left for Guaymas. The bus on the way back to Guaymas was far less crowded than the first bus and we were able to sit in a seat. We arrived in Guaymas shortly before 8:00pm so we walked around and looked at the stores before going to the bus terminal. We paid for our bus tickets and then walked down the street to get tacos before the trip. I ordered a torta con jamon y queso which was a mistake. The sandwich was loaded with mayonnaise that dripped all over my hands and it tasted terrible. I knew I would be paying for this mistake later. As I forced down the sandwich, I watched as an old, drunken Mexican harassed Karl while he waited. It was entertaining to watch and I hoped the guy wouldn’t notice me. As we both got up to leave the drunk started rambling about us coming back to Guaymas and staying at his place. He then tried to give us a blessing or something as we tore free from his handshake and escaped to the bus terminal. The bus was late arriving but it was okay because this time we had seats to sit in!

Día Cinco: The Bus Ride Home

As the bus drove on through the night, the temperature began to fall. It began to get colder and colder as each hour passed. Just before we got to the border, we were stopped by the Mexican military and most people evacuated the bus. I didn’t feel like going out in the cold so I stayed on the bus and failed to wake up Karl, who was sleeping in the seat behind me. An armed soldier came on the bus and walked down the isle and stood above me. I was half asleep and didn’t know what was going on so I couldn’t understand what he was asking me. I asked him to speak slowly in Spanish, and then told him I didn’t speak Spanish. He said something about Tucson and I agreed that is where I was going. He walked past me and pointed at Karl. I told him he was a friend travelling with me. He tapped on Karl’s head. Karl pulled off the shirt that was covering his face and was surprised to wake up to an armed soldier standing over him. The soldier asked for his I.D. and then walked off the bus. Everyone boarded the bus again and we continued toward the border.

The temperature continued to drop as Karl and I shivered through the night to stay warm. We had to wait at the border for an hour or two as usual before entering the U.S. At one point we had to get off the bus to show identification to the border patrol and stand outside in the freezing cold while they inspected the bus. A few people were denied access and a few others had to show more identification. While this process went on, we boarded the bus again and shivered while we waited. Finally, after what seemed like forever, the bus started and we were on our way again. As the bus gained speed, the cold wind from outside leaked in through the windows and persisted in cooling the bus even further. We arrived in Tucson at 6:00am and were happy to shuffle into the bus station. The bus station felt like a furnace even though it was only 20 degrees warmer than the bus was. After several minutes we became miserable and cold again. It was Sunday so the city bus wouldn’t start running for a few more hours. I knew that Paul and Philippe woke up early on occasion so I called Paul’s phone to see if he was awake. He was sleeping, but still picked up the phone and said he would pick us up. I told him I was sorry for waking him and forced myself to politely tell him to take his time and pick us up whenever he is ready. He told me he would leave in a half hour. Karl and I watched Mexican MTV and giggled a little at some of the nonsense and bands that we saw as we waited. Eventually, Paul arrived to pick us up. The chariot he picked us up in was a comfortable 80 degrees inside and Paul went so far as to turn on the heated seats. It felt magnificent.

After arriving back to the house, Karl and I went to breakfast at a nearby diner called Bobo’s. We devoured eggs and potatoes and then Karl dropped me off at my house where I proceeded to curl up under several blankets and watch movies all day long.

The Fire Clean-up Party and "Wes the Mess"

2007-11-03T09:41:00.000-07:00

One of the Kilcher sisters, Stellavera, lost her cabin to a fire a year ago so the family gathered together to help dig through the ashes of the cabin to recover lost memorabilia, as well as remove the remains of the house from the property. The property was located on the Kilcher farm. Mossy drove Barbara and me through the property on a barely visible path in the overgrown grass until we were a few hundred yards away from the site, hidden behind a patch of forest. She was not feeling like helping just yet because she needed to check on a lumberyard to get wood for the winter. She dropped us off with an excuse to tell everyone for her and t hen drove off. As soon as she drove away, a large Chevy truck in terrible shape but still running came by. The half dazed man driving the truck asked if we needed a lift so we jumped into the truck and sat next to him on the bench seat. The man told us that he was known as “Wes the Mess.” The name seemed to fit him quite perfectly. He reminded me a lot of my janitor when I lived in Park Hall my freshman year of college. He was a little slow and it was apparent that he had done many drugs in his past. Nevertheless, he was a very nice, trustworthy guy.

The clean-up was just as I expected minus the pot smoking. I imagined a group of hippies singing and smoking a lot of weed while they dug through the rubble. Instead, there was a large group of hippies standing and sitting around a small bonfire eating and listening to a guy with some type of flute playing “Yesterday” by the Beatles. There was a table full of pizza and a homemade pasta bake. Barbara and I brought a bag of fresh caramel popcorn from the farmers’ market for everyone to enjoy. I was disappointed to not see any beers so I dove straight into the pasta and pizza to make up for my dismay. Barbara and I walked over to the fire and introduced ourselves to a few people and exchanged the normal “hi, where are you from” deal. There was a 10 year old boy sitting by the fire who immediately started asking me strange questions. He was a very eccentric boy and I can only imagine what his parents were like. He was without a doubt the strangest little boy I have ever encountered. I wish I had some examples of what he was talking about but it was so random that it has escaped my mind. I noticed a swing near the fire so I motioned to Barbara and we walked over to check it out. The property was located in a clearing with forest all around with a beautiful view of the ocean. The property was about 200 feet above the ocean so there was a cliff overgrown with bushes and trees. The swing was located right on the edge of the cliff so that when you started swinging on the tree, you actually went over the cliff. Barbara was a little timid of trying it out first and I figured I had nothing to lose so I tested it out and then jumped on it for a test run. The branch made a loud cracking sound and sent me tumbling through the bushes and trees which tore my body to shreds. Just kidding. The swing was completely safe. The tree also happened to be a great climbing tree. I climbed up about 20 feet and sat overlooking the ocean while bald eagles flew by overhead. Barbara took out her clove cigarettes and we shared one while taking in the amazing view. By this time, the Kilchers had started the clean-up and we were asked to join in. The clean-up was ridiculous. I was forced to do the manual labor of helping to lift old, rusted stoves onto the beds of trucks. I also had to work with an old man in his 70’s digging out cement foundation blocks. The blocks weighed about 100lbs each and I had to hurl them into a pile. Everybody else dug through the rubble while Stellavera frantically ran around telling everyone to keep anything that looked valuable or interesting so she could make a mobile remembering the cabin. The pile designated for the mobile had a lot of melted glass, broken ceramic figures, and dinnerware. It was apparent that Stellavera collected angel figurines. I say this because they were all over the place. They were in the rubble and perched on trees in the forest all around us. After a few hours of this chaos, the 2 pickup trucks were full and ready to go to the garbage dump. Out of all the people helping with the clean-up, who do you think had to go help with this task? That’s right; Barbara and I were told to help. Barbara rode with Fay (whom I had worked for the previous week helping her move her belongings out of a cabin she had been cabin-sitting for the past 2 years). I was asked to ride with Wes. Wes was a talker. He talked and talked the whole drive. He told me about all of the local bands in Homer and which ones were good. Although he talked an awful lot, I liked Wes. He was a very likable guy. He acted very spaced out and calm so it was pleasant to be around him. The garbage dump was on the other side of Homer so Wes decided to just take the load to the dumpsters. There is no trash pick-up in the outskirts of Homer so the people have to haul their trash to these dumpsters. I was pretty sure it was illegal but I helped him toss all of the charred metal scraps into the dumpsters. As we were emptying the truck, Wes talked to an older man that was emptying his trash too. Wes seemed to know the guy and asked him if he wanted any of the crap we were throwing away. The man got real excited and started digging through the mess until he found some old rusted pipes that he could use. He told Wes to let him know if he found anymore and then left. It only took about 15 minutes to unload the truck and another 15 minutes for Wes to finish talking to the random people gathered around. Eventually, we started on our way back to the site. Wes started digging through some things in his truck and then announced he needed to go to his house real quick. His house was on the way so he stopped in and ran inside for a minute. He pulled out onto the road and started driving with his knees while he searched the truck once again. His hands immersed with a bag full of marijuana and a one hitter. With much grace, he packed it full and took a few good puffs while steering with his knees. He was quite the multi-tasker because as he was doing all this he managed to wave and smile to the cars that passed by with people inside that he knew. He told me that it was pretty common for people in Homer. He told me a story of how he once got pulled over by a police officer while he was completely baked. The officer asked him if he was okay to drive and then let him go. Wes said they were mainly looking out for the drunks and didn’t mind so much if you were high. “Oh, because that makes sense,” I said sarcastically. He nodded and said it was ridiculous but Alaska has had a lot of problems with drunk driving so that’s what the look out for.

Naturally, we got lost on the way back to the former cabin site so it took us a little longer than anticipated. By the time we got there, most of the people were gone, including my ride back to Seaside Farm. We got out and talked to everyone for a few minutes and then I told Wes I needed to get back so he offered to give me a ride. Wes told me that he worked just down the road from the hostel in the kitchen at a sushi restaurant called Wasabi’s. I figured he worked as a cook but I later found out that he worked in the dish room. I went in to see him once and he was wearing a trash bag to keep his clothes dry. Poor guy. Anyway, he dropped me off and talked to Mossy for who knows how long while I went inside.

Alaska 2007 (Travel Log)

2007-09-26T20:35:00.000-07:00

Day 1: Flew into Anchorage 1 hour late via Alaska Airlines. Jason from the hostel picked me up at the airport and drove me back to the hostel.

Day 2: Took the bus from the hostel to Eagle River. I walked down the entrance ramp of the highway and stood on the side of the road with a sign that read “Denali.” Spent the night in Talkeetna.

Day 3: Hitched a ride with a band member from Talkeetna to Parks Highway. Got another ride to the Wilderness Access Center at Denali National Park from 2 college kids on their way to Fairbanks.

Day 5: Walked to the road outside the park and got a ride from a guy from a musician from Seattle on his way to go fishing at Montana River outside of Talkeetna. Got a ride from an old man and his children to Eagle River. Got a ride from a young kid from Chicago that was working as a commercial fisherman to downtown Anchorage. Walked down the road until it became a highway and received a ride from a college student on his way home to Girdwood.

Day 6: 2 heavyset girls in a rental car picked me up and took me to the Homer/Seward intersection. Immediately, a guy traveling from Seward to Homer picked me up and took me into Kenai so he could check it out for himself too.

Day 7: I spent some time standing in the rain but finally got a ride with a construction worker to the road that goes directly to Homer. A woman in a van picked me up and took me no more than 2 miles. A Portugese commercial fisherman picked me up in a beat up truck and took me on a tour of the Spit in Homer and then to Seaside Farm.

Day 8 – 28: Hitchhiking in and out of Homer

Day 29: Barbara helped me hitch a ride in front of Safeway. I had to help the guy load a mattress into his truck to take to Anchorage. He was going to Kodiak island for a few weeks. He dropped me off at the Homer/Seward intersection where I was picked up by an older gentleman who talked the whole time about his history in Alaska, the area, sites along the way, and places I should visit. He had time so he took me all the way to the park office at Exit Glacier.

Day 30: Got a ride from the park office into Seward with an elderly couple on their way to the marina. They gave me the final convincing I needed to go to the Sea Life museum. Took a walk toward some remote campsites at Miller’s Point and then hitched back into Seward with a city worker. Walked to the edge of town and waited for an hour or so until a middle-aged Iraq veteran picked me up. He was driving a motor home he borrowed from a friend so he picked up another guy from Czech Republic who was also headed to Anchorage airport. The guy decided to go to Anchorage as well and visit the VFW. He dropped us off at the airport first. After being unsuccessful at checking into my flight early and getting rid of my bags, I caught a bus downtown and lugged everything with me. I watched the sun set and hung out for a few hours before catching the last bus of the day back to the airport to wait for my redeye flight home.

Places to visit next time:

Arctic Circle, Kodiak, Valdez, Cordova (definitely), Palmer, Hope, Wittier

Alaska 2007 (2nd Email Story)

2007-08-24T14:11:00.000-07:00

My experience in Kenai was terrible. It turns out that my phone wasn't working very well so I was not able to contact the farm I was supposed to work on there. I was extremely upset because I was stranded in the rain there. The lady called today and said she didn't receive any calls from me that day and that she had been waiting all day for me to call just as I had waited for her. Anyway... I decided to go to the local bar, The Rainbow, to have some drinks and waste time waiting for her to call. It is not a gay bar as the name would lead you to believe. I drank with the locals and had a really good time. Kenai reminds me a lot of small town Ohio so you can imagine how well I fit in with the rednecks there...they loved me, to say the least. It was getting late (8pm) and I was exhausted from travelling and drinking and whatnot so I left the bar and searched for a place to camp. It was raining for the 3rd night in a row and I was not happy about having to stay in a tent again. I found a spot on the beach for the bay and snuggled up in my soaking wet sleeping bag inside of my damp tent. The alcohol was enough to put me to sleep until 2am when trucks and airplanes started circling my tent. I thought they were just messing with me since I was the only tent on the beach. I was a little scared at first but it went off an on like that for a couple hours so I just got really irritated. It turns out they were just checking the beach for people fishing illegally. It was still raining when I woke up the next morning so I packed up and went to a really cool little coffee shop on the beach for breakfast. I had some type of quiche and it tasted amazing since I have been living off of dried food and nuts for the past week! After breakfast I broke into an RV park and took my first shower after 5 days. You can imagine how much better I felt after that. I then made my way to the highway to get the hell out of Kenai and down to Homer. That day became the day of job offers. My first ride tried to recruit me to work construction with him. He gave me his card and told me to call him if Homer doesn't work out as I expect. My next ride was for 2 miles...worthless.

The final ride to Homer was with a crazy Brazilian fisherman. He picked me up in a beat up truck that had a loose steering wheel. He drove all over the road and scared the shit out of me. Oh, and he was drinking a Milwaulkie's Best beer but claimed he doesn't drink and this was his only one. He ended up giving me a tour of Homer and "the spit." Check it out on the map to see what I'm talking about...it's a really cool piece of land that stretches into the bay and has a bunch of restaurants and boats on it. I ran like 9 million errands with "Alex" so he could get money and he told me of all the land and crazy properties he owns. He also offered me a job as a crew member on his boat. He is going to pick me up at the farm I am staying on tomorrow morning and we are going on a 3 day Halibut fishing trip. From what I hear from him and other fisherman, I'm going to make a lot of money doing it. I'm just going for the experience and to see all the islands and wildlife off the mainland. So I am now a commercial fisherman. Tell all your friends.

So the place I am staying... I am staying with Jewel's family. You know, the singer Jewel? Yeah, her aunt runs the hostel and farm I am staying at. I am going to help build a house with her dad. Crazy, right? Just another day for a guy like me, lol. The people at the hostel are all pretty cool but also a little weird. I'll have to explain later once I learn more about each of them. I share a room with 3 other people right now and there other floating around the property in tents and cabins. There is also a rasberry field that is amazing. Oh, and there is a pretty cute Swiss girl staying there. She's pretty quiet and has trouble understanding English.

Minutes after I arrived with my fisherman buddy (who creeped out every female by the way) I was invited to have dinner with a German family that is staying in private quarters of the hostel. It was me, a 17 year old girl, her mom, and her mom eating pancakes and some type of carrot sauce at dinner last night. It was really nice. They got to practice their English and listen to my Alaskan adventure and I got to hear about the small town they are from in Germany.

After dinner, I went for a walk and watched the clouds and fog drift over the mountain towards the bay as the sun set. I'll have to show pictures because I can't describe it. Oh yeah, the hostel is up in the hills of Homer and over looks the bay. The view is beautiful. I sat there and drank tea with two of my roommates (it turns out we are all originally from New Jersey) and looked out over the bay. Anyway, I walked for about 2 hours last night, then hitched a ride with the first car that passed me. Hitch-hiking is the most common form of transportation here. Lucky for me, right? I ship out for the open waters tomorrow. I am sure to bring back another wild story. Maybe I'll be on the Discovery Channel. No, it's nothing intense like that. We have good weather this weekend and we aren't going far out to see. We plan to catch between 10,000 - 20,000 pounds of halibut. The going rate is $5 per pound. Have a good weekend, everyone.

Alaska 2007 (1st Email Story)

2007-08-22T16:25:00.000-07:00

I just spent 45 minutes writing an email and the library computer time ran out and deleted the whole thing. After a failed suicide attempt I am now rewriting the whole thing. This one will probably be shorter than the last - sorry.

I flew into Anchorage late Friday night. I was picked up at the airport by the hostel I was staying at. It was late so I went out to grab a drink before I went to sleep and stopped at a place called "The Great Alaskan Bush Company" (try to figure out what that place was like). The hostel was really loud and I only slept for 4 hours. I woke up and started talking to the people staying at the hostel to figure out the best way to get to Denali. Everyone I have talked to about traveling in Alaska including these guys told me that hitch-hiking is easy and every does it. So I took a bus to the edge of town to try to get a ride but was discouraged against doing so by the bus driver. He told me he had been driving to Denali for 7 years and I wouldn't get a ride so he drove me back to the hostel. Of course I had to ride his whole route until he went back and got to meet his bus driver friends at their "break place." It was definately an experience and I never realized how much money those guys make...not too bad. I went back to the hostel to figure out when the bus for Denali left. I went back to the bus stop to wait for the bus only to realize I was getting on the wrong bus. I decided to go with it and go back out of town to Eagle River to try hitch-hiking.

I have only hitch-hiked in Mexico so I'm used to hitching from a dirt road in a small village. Here, I was walking down the entrance ramp of a highway to try to get a ride. I felt very vulnerable standing out there with my thumb in the air. Sure enough, after 15 minutes a beat up Volvo pulled off the road. I ran up not knowing what to expect to see behind the wheel of this ghastly vehicle. Luckily, it was a 27 year old girl who was born in central Africa, went to college in New Mexico, and is now living in Alaska and on her way to a wedding party in Talkeetna. We had to make a pitstop in Wasillo so she could get food for the party and ran into some random lady with her deaf child that she knew. When we got back on the highway I noticed her waving to cars passing us in the opposite direction. She claimed it was a small town but I corrected her and told her we were 70 miles outside of Anchorage. Evidently everyone in Alaska knows eachother. I have been here less than 5 days and have already run into 3 of the same people in different locations! Her name was Rachel Day and she talked me into camping on the river bank in the small town of Talkeetna. What a suggestion! I camped right on the beach and as the sun began to set, the sky cleared and I could see the whole Alaska mountain range including Denali. It was amazing! The sun set for 1.5 hours and was brighter than I have ever seen in my life (due to the tilt of the earth being closer to the sun this far up north I later found out). It didn't really get dark until 11pm so I decided to check out Talkeetna then. Rachel had said her and her friend were going to be hanging out in the town that night because it was Saturday and would be "hopping." Hopping it was. The town had a pizzaria, free thrift store, post office, and of course 2 bars. I stepped into one of the bars where a rock band was playing. The bar was about the size of my mom's living room. I was feeling pretty exhausted after all of the traveling so I decided to just go back to my tent and crash.

The next morning I packed up my stuff and caught a ride with the lead guitarist in the band to the edge of the highway. He had a girl's name...Lily or something like that. As I was waiting on the highway, I saw a black bear cub run across the street about 100 feet away. Fortunately for me, the mother bear wasn't following. After 15 minutes, 2 college kids on their way to Fairbanks pulled over to give me a ride. Their names were T-Kon (I really doubt he spells it this way) and Martin. They were listening to some crazy rap music that I couldn't figure out and they both acted a little spacey and used the word "intense" a lot. After 30 miles we stopped for a break and to look out at a great view point of the Alaska range. When we got back in the car, suddenly the ride got way better and I began to understand the music they were playing. They dropped me off at the Wilderness Access Center of Denali. I picked out where I wanted to hike, watched an hilarious 30 minute video, and was on my way. On the bus ride in, we stopped to see a bull caribou with hugh antlers and a herd of sheep on top of a mountain. I road the bus halfway in to about mile 45 where I would begin my hike. I hiked along a river across a glaciel plain to camp in a remote mountain range. I set my tent up where I would have a good view over the plain, watched the sun set, and went to sleep.

The next morning I awoke to see a herd of 30 sheep on the mountain adjacent to mine. I watched them graze and then pair off to go take naps together. They were so cool to watch. I went on a hike to the bottom of a glacier and filled up my water containers. The water was so cold that I could only hold my hand in it for a few seconds before it started to burn. I was supposed to hike out and go to a different spot to spend that night but I felt too lazy so I just moved my tent to a better spot. It started to rain at 5pm and did't stop until about 8am the next morning. I always wondered what I would do if I was stuck in my tent while it was raining. It turns out I slept a lot. I would sleep for a little while, wake up and read, sip a little whiskey, then go back to sleep. I repeated this cycle several times until it was dark enough to sleep through the night.

After the rain had stopped the next morning, I said goodbye to my sheep roommates and took off to catch my bus out of the park. On the hike in I had tried to keep my feet dry by hopping rock to rock whenever I crossed the river but on the way back I just walked straight through the water. When I finally reached the road, I had to wait for a specific green bus to take me out which took forever. I read a little and then took off my wet socks. I put on dry socks and wrapped my feet in plastic bags before putting my shoes back on so they wouldn't get wet again from the shoes. Finally, I flagged down a bus and convinced the driver to give me a ride back. I talked to a few of the people on the bus and caught as much of the scenery as I could. We stopped to watch a grizzly bear that was laying down to eat a patch of blueberries. The bears in the park are 80% vegetarian because of all the berries. This lazy bear really seemed to have "the life." As we were stopped, the mother of a girl I was talking to tapped me on the shoulder. She handed me a energy bar and looked into my eyes and said, "Here, don't starve!" I was a little taken aback and thanked her for the gift. I ate the bar and tried to figure out why she made that seem so awkward. It then occured to me that I had just finished explaining to her daughter how I was hitch-hiking around the state and then I noticed the torn plastic bags sprouting up my legs from my shoes.

When we arrived back at the Wilderness Access Center, I returned the bear container (I forgot to mention this - I had to hold my food in this thing and drag it around everywhere I went). I then walked out of the park to the highway to get a ride back to Anchorage and hopefully to Kenai to start working on the organic farms I came here for. As soon as I put my backpack down, Jonathon picked me up. He said he remembered me asking him a question in the park. He was a musician from Seattle (originally from Sacramento and Santa Cruz) and was hanging out with his brother, who works in the park. Now he was taking his brother's car to drive around Alaska fishing. We stopped for a bite to eat on the way toward Anchorage and had some really good conversations. He was a really cool guy and we got along well. It's funny how you can develop these friendships with people in such a short period of time. He dropped me off at a river he wanted to fish at outside of Talkeetna. As he was unpacking his gear, I was climbing into the back of an orange truck. He laughed and said farewell. Jim and his son and daughter gave me a ride to Eagle River, where I had originally started my journey. It rained a little while I was in the back of his truck but the scenery and mountains I saw from there was absolutely beautiful. He pulled off the highway and I walked back down the entrance ramp to catch anther ride. Aaron, a kid from Chicago currently working in commercial fishing, picked me up. He drove me into Anchorage but didnt' know his way around because he just moved to Alaska in June. He took me to a gas station where we got directions to the road that lead out of town toward Kenai and took me to where I needed to be. I walked for a little ways and got on the highway to get my final ride of the night. Josh, a UAA student, picked me up on his way to Girdwood where he worked in the winter as a ski instructor at the only ski resort in the state. The drive around the cape to Girdwood was stunning! It was comparable to highway 1 in northern California with the rocky coast and ocean. Except this drive had a mountain range much larger that wrapped around the whole bay. In between the mountains where crystal blue glaciers. Josh dropped me off at a river off the highway where I could camp for the night.

I had breakfast the next morning at a little cafe close to my campsite where I ate and looked out at the mountains in the distance. The people at the gas station claimed there was no internet close so I decided to leave for Kenai then. It took about 20 minutes but 2 large females picked me up. They were in the midst of eating cheese wiz on crackers and singing along to the Phantom of the Opera on their cd player. It actually wasn't a bad ride. Betsey and Brenda actually had some good stories of their travels in Alaska. They dropped me off and I got a ride right into Kenai with the most boring man in the world - Bob.

Okay, I am being kicked off the computer. I hope everyone is doing well and that this story was entertaining enough. The first one was probably better.

Alaska 2007 (Journal)

2007-08-21T20:30:00.000-07:00

Sunday 8-19-07 – Sitting on a log on the beach in Talkeetna, AK (late morning)

I awoke this morning after the best night sleep I have had in a while. I am staying in a town called “Talkeetna,” where the girl I hitched a ride with, Rachel Day, recommended I stay. She was so right. I am camping in a small patch of woods on the bank of a river. As the clouds break in the distance, I can see the Denali mountain range as the morning sun shines upon it.

The sunset last night was unlike any I have ever seen. For one thing, the sun shone brighter than my eyes have ever seen. The only reasoning I can think of is that the air must be much clearer because of how far north I am. I can see s o much detail in the mountain range in the distance – as if I were standing in the foothills. Anyway, back to the sunset. The show started around 9:15pm and went on past 10:30pm. It was a slow motion sunset. The clouds very gradually became bright yellow, then red. It was so beautiful and yet so difficult to sit and enjoy. I kept waiting for the best photo opportunity and was also thinking when I should go into the town. Oh yeah, the town… Talkeetna is not rally a town but rather more of a large campsite. There is a general store, pizza place, post office, souvenir stands, a free thrift store, and as in all Alaskan towns, a couple of bars. Rachel had recommended that I grab an Alaskan Amber at one of the bars because it was Saturday and should be a good night. She was on her way to a wedding party and said s he would probably see me out that night. I did walk into town at 10:30pm to walk around. I stopped in to one of the bars to check out the band that was playing. It looked like a great time. Everyone was smiling and talking. The bar was also tiny – about 20’ by 40’ (with the band!). I was feeling exhausted after a stressful day of trying to decide if I should get a bus or chance it and hitch to Denali. In the end I chose right. So to bed I went.

Wednesday 8/22/07 – In my tent on a beach in Kenai, AK (8:00pm)

I am stranded in Kenai tonight. I have not been able to get a hold of the farm I am supposed to stay at. I have waited all day thinking that it’s not a big deal and I will hear from her but now I am alone on a beach waiting for the tide to carry me away. I had a great time hanging out at the “Rainbow Bar” (not like the rest of the U.S. would expect) but now I feel stranded. It’s funny how you hold to things of the past for comfort. If my phone wasn’t dead I would actually think about calling the “old” Bri for support. I even broke down and turned on my MP3 player like I promised myself I wouldn’t (I wanted to feel like I was roughing it so I outlawed the use of my music player). I wonder if other people cling to safe things from the past like this…probably. It’s comforting but I know it will get me nowhere. I just hope it will help me get through to a better state of mind. This feeling of being helpless and my 5^th night outdoors and 3^rd night of rain is not very inspiring. I had looked forward to a warm, dry bed to sleep in all day. I also held off on eating in anticipation of a big, healthy home-cooked meal on the farm. Fortunately for me however, a couple at the bar shared half of their sub with me.

Sunday 8-26-07 – In my bottom bunk of the hostel room at Seaside Farm, Homer, AK (morning)

I was just slowly waking up and realized something. I have only been here for 8 days but already I am starting to adapt to living here (if only for a short time). The events of this summer and before seem to be in my distant memory. It’s strange how one (or maybe just me) can settle down in a new place so quickly.

**I had felt at home at the hostel. I had my own bed and living space. I looked forward to eating breakfast and dinner every day with Barbara, which made it feel a little like being in a family. I just felt very comfortable. All of my attachments in life felt like they had faded away to a distant part of my mind. My mind was filled with the daily rituals of my new life in Homer.

Thursday 8-30-07 – Sitting on the couch in the hostel room (bedtime)

It is strange. I think that I value my alone time more than most people. But tonight staying in the hostel alone is not what I want. I would even settle for having a person I don’t care for staying in the room with me. I guess that I am getting accustomed to being around different people all the time. Just today I have met Fay’s brother Otz, her niece Geraldine, a pizza guy Aaron, a worker at Fitz Creek Becky, an older couple from Oregon, and I drank wine and ate chocolate with a German guy Garek and his father. Oh, and I continue to hang out with and eat meals with Barbara from Switzerland. I wonder if I will miss being around so many people when I return to Tucson. I feel like I am so much more of a friendly person. Tonight, I really don’t like staying here alone. I’m not really lonely – I would just prefer the company of others.

**This feeling faded away quickly. By the end of my stay, I was hoping for the hostel room to be empty every night. I had grown tired of sharing my space with other people. I think I was feeling this way at the time because Barbara had just moved out and Shawn was gone. I liked sharing the room with the two of them and felt a little lonely when they left.

Friday 9-14-07 – Sitting on a rock at a small look out point a short distance away from my campsite at Exit Glacier in Seward, AK (morning)

Serenity (from above)

The rain stopped late last night. I woke up to see blue skies with a few light clouds. I walked a short distance down the trail to catch a view of the valley below Exit Glacier. The sky is completely clear and there is fog rising up from the valley. It looks as though there is a calm fire spreading over the valley causing clouds of smoke to rise up and disperse into the rising sun. The fog is slowly climbing up the mountainside as it thins out to reveal the braided river and yellow forest below. All the while, a calm, cool breeze blows through the fireweeds that surround me. As the sun rises behind the mountain range it casts a blanket of shadows over the mountain, highlighting the small glaciers as they slowly seep into the crevices of the mountain.

The smoky valley below has an eerie, hallow presence. It lies still as the fog passes through. Even the river appears to have submitted itself to this massive force pressing from the north.

Easter Road Trip

2007-04-10T08:05:00.000-07:00

After writing this story of going on a 4 day backpacking trip across southern Arizona and New Mexico, I was reminded of a conversation I had a few months ago with a guy I went to high school with. He asked me, “What do ya’ll do in Arizonia?” I responded with, “Well, I like to go hiking a lot.” He asked, “You mean you climb on top of mountains?” I said, “Yeah, something like that.” “Why’d you want to do somethern like that fer?” The conversation ended there. Anyway, I decided that on this particular trip I needed to get away by myself for a while and find some mental clarity. I was going out a lot in Tucson and drinking a lot….well, not as much as some of you are used to from me, but a lot for a 24 year old with a somewhat respectable job. I was also not feeling the same after being in Las Vegas for a few days and downing $425 bottles of vodka. I don’t know how entertaining this story will be for you and it’s long, so if you’re bored, go ahead and read on about my Easter vacation.

On Thursday, I visited Tombstone and Bisbee on my way to the Chiricahua Mountains to camp. I visited Big Nose Kate’s saloon to get Marianne hot sauce and to have a beer. I liked the bartender. He was in his late 20’s and dressed up as a cowboy, of course. I don’t think he is from Arizona or maybe he has just never left Tombstone. We were talking about the desert heat and he mentioned something about going to “Pima” once but he had never been anywhere else. I was a little puzzled at where to bring this rousing conversation next so I told him that I better get on my way but before I leave Tombstone I better have a shot of tequila. The bartender got a big smile on his face and spun an automatic tequila shot pourer around showing the various bottles attached. I told him to just give me the worst, cheapest tequila he had. After my shot and beer I decided that it would be a good idea to visit a sales lead that I had in Tombstone. I found the guy conducting mining tours and almost turned around because it didn’t seem to be worth my time. I decided to talk to him anyway and it turns out he is the former mayor of Tombstone and is going to take me around to the guy that owns all the bars and possibly set them up with security systems. Go figure. I drove on to Bisbee and walked around the town a little. Bisbee is a great small, historic mining town minus all the sketchy hippies and teenagers. I wandered around a little and stopped in a bookstore but didn’t find anything interesting to purchase. From there, I headed toward my final destination for the day in the Chiricahua Mountains. As the sun started to set behind the Dragoon Mountains, I was on my way driving straight up the mountain to my campsite. There was a designated campsite and then random spots to camp along the road. I was surprised to find the one at the very top available. I quickly pitched my tent and started a fire. My vacation had started.

When I woke up Friday morning, I took a hike on a nearby trail to the top of the mountain I was camping on called Johnson Peak. It was a pretty tough 2.5 miles straight up hill. I was surprised to be as tired as I was so I climbed on top of a large boulder, ate an apple and orange, and checked out the view. When I returned from the hike, the time read “9:00am” so I packed up and headed toward Silver City. I arrived in Silver City about 2.5 hours later, starving. It was a pretty big city but nothing really excited me about it. I drove around for a little while trying to find the “Silver City Brewing Company” that I had found online because I wanted to eat there and try one of their homemade beers. I eventually found it but it didn’t open until 3pm. Fortunately for me, New Mexico is an hour ahead of Arizona. I still had an hour or so to kill so stopped by the park ranger’s office to find out where to go hiking and he told me that there are 1500 miles of hiking trails available. He told me to go up to the Gila Wilderness to find the best hikes or even stop along the way and hike/camp. It was almost 3pm so I drove to the brewery for a bite to eat. To my disappointment the brewery resembled a small pizza place and didn’t look like too many people visited it. I took a seat at the bar and ordered their Amber selection. It was actually really good. The bartender informed me that the beer was actually made by a larger brewery that distributes the beers to places like this. I talked to the bartender and another guy that was in there from Dublin, Ireland until I finished my beer then I took off. I decided to go to a health shop that I had seen earlier called “Messiah’s.” I ordered a terrific homemade veggie burger with avocado. After lunch, I made a quick tour through the historic downtown of Silver City. It was great. There were a bunch of little café’s, restaurants, and little shops. I also saw the birthplace of Billy the Kid…so exciting. It was just a small log cabin on the corner of a busy intersection with a sign that read “Birthplace of Billy the Kid.” It was getting late so I started heading toward the Gila Wilderness. The road that lead there was a very narrow, winding road that weaved its way through the trees that covered the mountains. It felt like I was just driving through a forest. I became tired from all of the curves fast so after about 15 miles, I pulled into a campsite that read, “Meadow Creek,” hoping to find a nice campsite next to a river. Instead, I parked my car and climbed up a very steep, rocky hill to a plateau that was about 3/4 mile in circumference. It seemed that I had the whole plateau to myself. I set up camp, started a fire so I could tell where my campsite was, and wandered around the forest. The forest must have recently burned down because there were charred remains of trees everywhere and the forest wasn’t very thick. I watched the sun set, behind the thick clouds overhead, then stared at the fire until I felt like going to sleep. I awoke in the early morning to a small rain shower but it only lasted a few minutes so I went back to sleep.

When I awoke Saturday morning, I started the fire again to get warm and have some tea and fruit. I decided to go for a hike to a peak that I had been eyeing the night before. I figured out my location and the location I was heading with my compass because I didn’t plan on there being a trail. I started down from my plateau and out of the campsite and to my surprise I came across a trail that seemed to lead right where I was going. The trail lead to just below the peak then circled around it and kept on going further away. I wanted to go to the top of the peak but stayed on the trail to see where it went to. I saw some type of cat feces on the trail and wondered if it was from a bobcat or mountain lion. Since my experience with cat turds is limited to domestic cats I really had no idea what it was. I also saw large, deep footprints that seemed to lead the way on the trail I was following. I thought they were bear footprints until I noticed the horse shoe marks in the softer ground about a mile later. I was disappointed and relieved at the same time. I passed through a couple of areas that had patches of snow that remained from the winter. It was about 65 degrees but the shade from the mountains must have preserved it. The trail seemed to go on with no destination so I turned around and headed back to my intended peak destination. The peak was surrounded by a lot of dry, prickly brush so I only managed to make it up to a small rock face. The view from the rock face was still good enough for me. I could see 30 miles north to the Gila Wilderness where I was going to be headed. There were lots of mountains and large canyons, which held a lot of potential. I had a small snack and went back to my plateau to pack up and get on the road again. The drive to the Gila Wilderness was worse than I had thought. There were even more winds in the road and lots of U-turns. It took me about an hour to go 30 miles. I went directly to the visitor center to find out where to go. My goal was to find an easy 3 or 4 mile hike to a river with the option of hiking to the top of a peak for the sun set. I was also curious about the hot springs in the area. I also specified that I didn’t want to see any other hikers. I decided on a 6.5 mile hike to the popular, “Jordan Hot Spring.” The old man at the center told me that nobody would be there so like an idiot, I trusted the guy that has probably never set foot outside the visitor center. I made a quick call on a pay phone to the two of you to tell you that if this place turned out to be amazing, I was going to stay an extra night. I had to ask the operator for instructions since the last time I used a pay phone was probably when I was 10 in Califon, NJ where I would ride my bike downhill the whole way and then call my parents for a ride home! The parking lot for the trailhead was pretty crowded but I figured all the cars were for the nearby campsites. The first 2 miles of the hike were along a ridge that overlooked 100’s of miles of wilderness – it was beautiful. I found that I got tired within those first two miles because I packed about 2 gallons of water because I didn’t buy iodine tablets to purify the water and because of the 5 mile hike I went on that morning. My shoulders were not up to the challenge of carrying 45 pounds. They sent shots of pain through my nerves with each step to remind me of their discomfort. I eventually came to a saddle that marked 4 more miles left. This part of the hike was great too. The trail took me through a canyon with a small, trickling stream. The canyon walls got more and narrower as I was going until they were about 10 yards apart. I finally arrived at the river that I was supposed to cross 15 times. The bank of the river was occupied by a family with about 8 kids and 4 dogs. I’m not a fan of the people that bring their dogs on hikes but if I were a dog person I probably would too. 2 dogs attacked me as I approached and before I was able to connect with a boot to the snout, a woman apprehended the creatures. I was very irritated but the woman was nice and told me how wonderful the springs were. She also gave me some helpful advice about the hike. Her kids stared at me with disillusionment as I crossed began to cross the river. I don’t know how else to describe the looks on their faces, it was almost eerie. I made it across without falling so the woman cheered me on as I waved my arms in triumph. The 15 crossings were very difficult because my legs were so tired that I could barely stand up and on top of that I had to fight the current of the river. My walking stick helped me regain my balance on a few near fatal falls. I say “near fatal” because had I fallen into the river and gotten all of my gear wet I probably would have just given up and let it sweep me away into oblivion. Not really, mom – just a little dark sarcasm for you. I passed a few people camping so I knew that I was getting close. I just hoped the campsites by the springs would be empty. Of course, they were not. There were only 3 campsites near the hot spring and 2 were taken. They were all pretty far away from each other so it wasn’t that big of a deal. I set all my stuff up once again and boiled water to add to my Katmandu Curry trail dinner that I brought. A hippie couple passed by as I was sitting by the fire and I really liked them. They were very quiet and seemed really nice. I would have rather had no people there at all but I didn’t mind them being around, I actually kind of liked it. I put my swimming shorts on and headed up to the hot spring, which was lofted above the trail about 50 yards from my campsite. The hot spring was quite large, about 30 feet by 20 feet and it had a little waterfall that brought the warm water down from the mountain. The spring is proof of the volcanic activity that caused the formation of the mountains in the Gila Wilderness. The spring was only about 90 degrees but it was nice enough and had a great view. There were two people in the spring when I arrived. I said, “Hello” and got a strange stare from the ugly guy that was in there. He continued to stare at me as he slowly crept to the other side of the spring. I could tell he was up to something so as I prepared to get in I kept glancing over to see what he was up to. I saw him reach for a woman’s swimsuit and slowly return to where he was. The woman was hidden by a tree but it was obvious what had been going on before I came up. “That’s just great” I thought to myself as I sunk my head in disgust and slowly merged myself into the water – “Two ugly old people tainting my hot spring.” I was really dirty so I had to get in and clean off. I got in and sat under the waterfall where all the fresh water came from so I felt safe from any infectious old person diseases. The water felt really nice after that long hike and the view of the mountains from the spring just added to it. I noticed the empty Tecate beer cans laying near the couple’s clothes and reenacted the sleazy advances the guy must have made before my arrival. After about 5 minutes I felt sufficiently clean and awkward so I dried off with the shirt I had been hiking in for the past 3 days and went back to warm up by my fire. I read a little of a book that I brought and then went to sleep early.

I think I was the first one up the next morning because I couldn’t hear anyone and there was no movement at my hippie friends’ site. I ate breakfast and packed my stuff up. I went back up to the springs to take a few pictures and found it occupied by a bunch of high school to college aged kids talking about smoking marijuana, taking shits, the usual absurdity. I was only able to take a few pictures because I didn’t want any of the kids ruining my shots. I grabbed my pack from my campsite, waived farewell to my friends across the way, and jumped into the river on route out of the wilderness. The hike out wasn’t nearly as difficult as the hike in but it was still no picnic. I made it out around 1pm New Mexico time. I knew it would take me an hour to get back within cell phone distance so I could call Marianne and let her know I wasn’t staying another day. Since I had time, I thought I had better check out the highlight of the wilderness – the Gila cliff dwellings. I paid the $3 entry fee and got the history of the dwellings from the old man that seemed to be running the show. He told me the dwellings had been there for 10,000 years and were made by the Mogollons. They were only used for about 24 years, and then abandoned. When the Navajo Indians came in, they thought they were made by the Gods so they didn’t go near them. When the Spaniards came in, they raided the dwellings, and then named the area and the people that must have built the dwellings after their officer at the time, Mogollon. How sweet of them. As I toured through the dwellings, it was apparent that I had just been adopted by a large Mexican family. There were about 20 of them and one was video taping the whole event. I’m sure they are watching it right now thinking, “Who is that guy with us?” I walked along next to another ranger and he gave me a little more history on the dwellings and then he made me sniff a tree. It turns out that Ponderosa Pine trees smell like butterscotch. As I was leaving, the original ranger that told me the history of the dwellings caught me and told me to check out another site that was nearby. I think he liked me because I was the only person who paid attention to him and acted interesting in the dwellings. The site he sent me to was another cave dwelling just outside of a campsite. The cave dwellings I toured were primarily used for religious purposes and the one he sent me to was most likely used as a home. It was getting late so I got back in my car and drove toward Silver City. I drove through the historic area again to make sure I experienced it all and then head back in the direction of Tucson. I decided that I wasn’t dirty enough and needed a 4^th night in the wilderness so I drove down a very bumpy and painful to my car dirt road to the backside of the Rincon Mountains 40 miles outside of Tucson. As I was setting up my tent and starting the fire, I felt like an old pro that had done it millions of times before. I really felt like a woodsman, it was great. I sat by the fire with my thoughts for a while. Then all of a sudden a yellow scorpion came out of the rocks near the fire, nearly crossing over my feet. I panicked a little and got my headlamp to keep an eye on him. He sat on the edge of a rock for a while, and then went back under. I figured he had enough of the fire so I put my feet back on his stone. A couple of minutes later, he darted out again next to my feet. After another close encounter I decided to retreat to my tent for the night. There was a large wind storm during the night that shook the tent for a few hours. It was nice to listen to and get jarred around inside the tent.

I awoke the next morning feeling dirtier than I have ever felt. My feet were black and my hands were callused, scarred, and brown from dirt. There was black dirt caked in my fingernails and all the way around my cuticles. “Cuticles.” I doubt that word gets added into many stories. I wondered just how much that hand sanitizer that I was using was really helping. I packed my stuff up one final time and took off for Tucson where a clean shower and comfy bed awaited me.

Cochise Stronghold Story

2007-01-13T14:44:00.000-08:00

This past weekend I took a trip to Cochise Stronghold to go camping with my buddy, Joe. Our plan was to check out some Arizona ghost towns and then camp at the Cochise Stronghold campsite. We have both heard great things about this place so we finally decided to check it out. On the drive, I noticed the all too familiar billboards for “The Thing.” I remember seeing these billboards for about 1,000 miles on my way out to Tucson from Ohio a year and half ago. I had asked a gas station attendant about the signs and he wouldn’t tell me anything, just that I had to see it for myself. So we pulled off on the exit for the truck stop/dairy queen/random souvenir store that housed “The Thing.” We paid our dollar and followed the yellow footsteps toward “The Thing.” After seeing some crazy shit that I never expected to see, we saw “The Thing” but there were no answers as to just what it was. I talked Joe into pressuring the store manager into giving him some more information. The store manager, Jerry, was an older gentleman dressed in typical rural Arizona attire complete with a belt buckle, cowboy hat, and pork chop sideburns. Joe asked him, “So what is it?” In his low key western draw, Jerry mumbled, “I dunno.” Joe said, “Well, where did it come from?” Jerry answered, “I dunno.” Joe became a little irritated and said, “You don’t know? Does anybody know?” Jerry replied, “The owner knows. It’s been here fer 50 years. I been here 15 years. I keep trying to get ‘em to tell me but he won’t tell me anything.” That is all we know about “The Thing” but if you are ever in the area, be sure to check it out. It was a well spent dollar.

We continued on our way and decided to stop at the old town of Cochise. The town had a small general store, post office, and hotel. The news had told us that the weather at night was going to dip below 10 degrees so we decided to check out the Cochise Hotel as a possible option for sleeping in a tent. The front door of the hotel had a note with a phone number to call if you were interested in seeing the hotel. We called the number and were told to meet a woman named “Mayfern.” Mayfern was an elderly lady from Indiana. She was just in town to see her grandchildren and didn’t know much about the hotel. She just knew that it was built in 1882 and is still exactly the same today as it was then aside from the new plumbing and heating/cooling system they installed last summer. She also mentioned that Doc Holliday’s wife, Big Nose Kate, worked for the hotel for 9 months. Mayfern gave us a tour of the hotel and it was the coolest hotel I have ever seen. Everything was original, from the antique furniture to the Edison light bulbs. After the tour, Mayfern talked to us for about an hour until and then we were on our way to find some other ghost towns. But first we decided to stop in the general store.

The store was unoccupied with a note reading, “Back in a couple minutes.” We hung out there for well over a couple minutes and was entertained by the friendly cat that drooled all over us as we pet it. Eventually, an older fellow in his 60’s came hustling over from across the street. He let us into the store and gave us a frozen sandwich for Joe and a burrito for me. We microwaved the food and sat down to chat with our new friend. We talked to him for about 3 hours…yes, 3 hours. The subjects ranged from how different kids are these days to nuking all of Iraq. The guy was actually very friendly and he liked the thought of Joe and I camping and drinking whiskey - I think it brought him back to when he was a kid. The post man showed up and chatted with us about “white lightning” moonshine from Tennessee and how it will “make your eye balls go crossed.” Then our friend’s wife and her friend, Wally, showed up. Wally was a very tiny older lady with the craziest voice I have ever heard. It sounded like it came directly from her sinuses below her eyes. I can only remember her name because it was a good one. We decided it was time to leave because if we didn’t get out then, we would never get out of there. The sun was starting to go down so we decided we better get out to our campsite.

We got out to the campsite and started a fire because it was already starting to get mind-numbingly cold. We sat by the fire, drank whiskey and Keystone Premium, and had some really good conversations. By the time the first snow flake fell I decided it was way too cold to stay up any longer. I retreated to my tent that is so small that I have to lay sideways in it and shivered myself to sleep. The next morning we got up and made some tea to try to warm up. When we were pouring the boiling water into a cup, some spilled out on the table and was frozen in a matter of minutes. Yeah, it was cold. We packed all our stuff back into the car and then set off for a hike into the wilderness. As most Arizona hikes go, it was incredible. We saw a few flowers, giant red rocks stacked on top of each other, and even a few free range cows.

We got back from the hike around 2:00pm and took off to find a diner to eat at. We passed a few good possibilities but then found the perfect place: T.J.’s Bar & Grill in Sun Sites, AZ. The bar only had a couple people in it who were drinking beers and watching football on the television. We sat in a couple of bar stools at the end of the bar and the friendly woman who owned the bar came over and gave us menus and beer. We ordered some of the worst bar food imaginable and proceeded to sip our beers. The 2nd shift girl arrived and gave the older woman a long embrace to mark the end of her shift. The older woman ran by us announcing that her shift was over. She then sat down at a bar stool and started drinking. The 2nd shift girl was 23 years old and grew up in Wyoming but went to school in Sun Sites. Oh, Sun Sites is just as big as Cochise, only it has a couple of bars. She was very nervous talking to Joe and me because we were probably the only two young guys she has seen in a long time. She walked up to the juke box to play music and I whispered to Joe, “This oughta be good.” She played some old country music that I don’t think I have ever heard but Joe claims he has. One song in particular had a chorus that went, “That ain’t my truck in her driveway.” Classic. Then we heard the young girl brag to the other bar patrons about how drunk she got the night before and how she could “live off jagger bombs.” Delicious. The girl came over once again and tried to get us to do shots because she claimed she was bored. Joe is not one to turn down a shot so he ordered the cheapest tequila they had. The girl then proceeded to explain how all her friends she used to go to school with now do a lot of meth and ask her why she’s so chubby. Her reply was, “I ain’t skinny like yous cuz I don’t do meth, I eat and drink beer instead and that makes me fat.” She already had me hooked from her jagger bomb comment. I could tell that this was the girl of my dreams. But she wasn’t convinced so she decided to try some more selling techniques on us. She told us that she was the youngest girl we would find around, “these here parts.” She also gloated about how she had all of her teeth and that “none of them wave at cha neither.” I’m pretty sure what she was trying to tell us was, “If you guys are looking to hook up, I’m your only option.” We told her we had to get going and she pleaded for us to stay and keep her company. And throughout the whole conversation the old owner of the bar kept yelling at the girl to stop talking to us and serve the other 2 people in the place drinks. I watched her pour a shot of Jim Beam for a guy that brought his own two liter of Ginger Ale. He then cut up an orange that he brought and ate it at the bar. Anyway, the girl even told us that there would be a couple of drunks coming in later that would buy us free drinks. We had “Bubbaloo” and his pink golf cart coming in. He starts drinking at 9am every day and is sure to be in soon. “Gloom and Doom” and his Mexican sidekick, Danny would also be in and they are always drunk and willing to buy strangers drinks too. As tempting as all of this was, Joe and I decided to quit while we were ahead and took off leaving Sun Sites behind, vowing that we must return some day.

Baja California Story

2006-11-30T23:10:00.000-08:00

A brief summary of the trip….we stayed in San Diego Tuesday night. I drove in early for a meeting I had during the day and had to wait around until after 12:00am CA time for Marianne, Leo, and Joe to arrive. After debating on staying at Marianne’s friend’s apartment or a hostel for over a week and not deciding until 1:00am late Tuesday night Eliza talked us into staying at her place…thanks Eliza.

We got up early Wednesday morning, bought Mexican car insurance online, made a few pit stops for food and to print the insurance, and were on our way to Mexico. After passing through Tijuana, we took the scenic route on the coast and it was beautiful. We drove through mountains and on top of cliffs over looking the water. We stopped for a little bit in Ensenada to look around and so Joe and I could get tacos….although I think we settled on a road beer instead. A couple hours later we passed over the rough roads into Erendira and to our destination, Coyote Cal’s hostel. The hostel was pretty empty so we all decided to splurge and get beds (rather than camp outside) from the unsociable manager. We received a tour from an old guy that seemed to think he knew everything and later informed me that he was an “elder” of an Indian tribe….oh, and he’s Caucasian and lives in California. Evidently Two Crows goes into Indian tribes and teaches the Indians the ways of their people. According to him it’s because they have lost touch with their heritage, but who knows if he’s just going in there and screwing them up even more…..and yes, he refers to himself as “Two Crows.” After this, we hitched a ride into town to get something to eat. The town consisted of a few tiny grocery stores and a restaurant. We grabbed a few beers and brought them into the restaurant with us and sat down to eat. After we ate we bought a few groceries to cook later in the hostel’s kitchen and headed back to the hostel, had a few beers at the hostel’s “barefoot cantina” and went to sleep for the night.

The first night’s sleep was pretty rough because I shared a dorm room with Joe under the kitchen of the hostel in the basement. I was kept up by people walking around above me and I almost fell out of the bunk a few times. In the morning (Thanksgiving) Joe and I went for a walk to see the rock full of sea lions going nuts with their “oart, oart” sounds and then we headed on to see the vortex that was on the beach. It was in a pretty cool location on the beach and you could sit in it and get a great look of the ocean and coast. When we returned to the hostel Marianne and Leo were up so we ate some pancakes that our buddy, Two Crows had made and then the 4 of us took off on a hike down the coat to “Long Beach.” Before we left, Two Crows mentioned that there would be an Indian “sweat lodge” at noon and we should try to make it back for it. We ended up getting as far as the vortex before turning back. It turned out that the Indian that was going to head the “sweat lodge” was ill so they postponed it until the following day. This, of course, irritated us so we hitched a ride in a really expensive RV to a village of houses near Long Beach. We made it to Long Beach and Joe went swimming while Leo, Marianne, and I ate some food and took a nap in the sand. After a while, we headed back and unfortunately weren’t able to hitch a ride so we had to walk the whole 5 miles. We got back to the hostel just in time for Thanksgiving dinner! I ate some of the best, juiciest turkey and homemade cranberry sauce that I have ever had….and the stuffing wasn’t too bad either. This was way better than the tacos Joe and I had the previous year in Alamos….and I’m sure Joe felt a little better this year too! We stuffed ourselves until we couldn’t eat anymore…or atleast I did and then it was cantina time. There were some terrible acoustic guitarists so Joe took over and amazed everyone with his musical genius. He was backed up on bongos by a really cool Indian named Tom that has evidently played drums for some big acts. Really, it was pretty amazing….the French Canadian girls were going crazy! And so was an old man named Wayne. He befriended Joe, made a few Johnny Cash requests, and told Joe he was like a son to him. Meanwhile, I had spotted two kids, a guy and girl, slip into the cantina and discover a beer bong. I drug Leo up there with me to test it out and thus ended the night. I named the beer bong “Rosarita” and Leo and I professed our love to her by consuming beer after beer down her sweet plastic throat. The kids turned out to be from Palmdale, CA and their parents lived in the nearby town, Erendira. Leo disappeared, I grabbed Joe and we took off in the back of a truck with the 2 kids. The truck was the coolest thing ever. It had no windows and the back of the cab was cut out and there was a couch in the bed of the truck. Oh, and there was a random local Mexican kid sitting in the back playing PS2. Joe and I sat in the back with the local…I’d call him by his name but I have no idea what it is so I’ll refer to him as “the local.” We drove off into the night to Erendira to grab some empty cuomos (32 ounce bottles of beer) so we could return them to the store and get more. I don’t really remember the rest of the night. I know we ended up hanging out in the parking lot of the hostel and every once in a while I would turn around to see the quiet manager of the hostel sitting behind me smoking weed then he would just disappear without a word spoken. Eventually Joe and I split up from them and went off onto the beach to camp for the night. We tried to camp at the vortex but couldn’t find it so I threw my tent down on the beach and Joe went up near the hostel to camp for the night.

The next day (Friday) I was awoken by screaming dirt bikes racing by my tent and then by Joe, Marianne, and Leo. I felt horrible but was really confused so I agreed to get up and walk to the hostel with everyone. Evidently it was just in time for the “sweat lodge.” It sounded like a great idea in the condition I was in….sarcasm. And to make it even better, Two Crows was heading it! So not only was I in no shape to even be standing but I had to endure a session designed to sweat out all the toxins in my body while I listen to some jackass teach me a valuable tradition in Indian culture. I didn’t put too much thought into it and just threw my head down and lead everyone into the teepee….well, it was more of a dome covered with blankets and plastic for insulation. Two Crows….I hope you think this name is as funny as we thought. I don’t think there was a minute during the setting up of this sweat lodge that we weren’t laughing at this guy and everyone being forced to call him by this ridiculous name….told us the sweat lodge would consist of 4 rounds which would get hotter with each round and then there would be a final “warrior round.” Me being the psycho I am already decided I was doing the “warrior round” no matter how unbearable this thing would turn out to be. They threw 7 red hot stones into the middle of the teepee and sealed the door, locking us in there to bake. After the second round, Joe looked like he was going to die so him and about half of the people took off out of there. The rounds lasted for about 15 minutes each and then there was a 10 minute break after each round where they would open the door and let us cool off. Then they would throw in 7 more stones and close it up again. After 4 rounds, all but 7 of us remained – 2 Crows, his wife, an old Indian named Tom (Joe’s bongo player), a young couple, Marianne, and me. 2 Crows was already showing signs of death because he was laying on his stomach with his face in the ground gasping for air but still teaching us the ways of the Indians….that’s dedication. The warrior round was the most horrible suffering I have ever been through….well not really, but pretty damn close! I cried. It was so hot and I felt so terrible and my hands and body were so wrinkled….yeah I cried. It finally ended and we all crawled out of the furnace. According to Joe, 2 Crows’ wife looked like a rat that had fell into a bathtub and struggled for hours trying to get. All of us took unbelievably cold showers outside and went inside to eat. This will mark the second and final shower of my trip….no soap, just water. Inside we saw the half-drowned rat drinking a beer and smoking a cigarette. What a great reward after a sweat lodge detox…. We hitched a ride into town in the back of Wayne’s truck so he could get some crab meat. We stopped at atleast 8 different places and kept getting directed to the wrong places but we finally got the meat….2 kilos of crab meat for $15. I think that’s worth atleast $100 in the U.S. We then left Wayne and went for a nice hike toward a beach volcano. We didn’t’ make it to the volcano because it started getting late and was difficult to hitch a ride back to Erendira. We finally got a ride and found a restaurant to eat more tacos and get some beers. After a long walk in the dark, we got back to the cantina. Leo and I played with “Rosarita” for a little while and impressed some of the people at the hostel. Joe went back to playing guitar but first came up to me and exclaimed in the most excited voice I have heard from him, “Hey man, check this out!” Before I could turn around completely to face him he had taken 1 double shot of tequila and polished it off immediately with a second. It was great. Wayne had a half full glass of tequila in his hand for Joe the whole time he played. By this time, Leo and I had recruited another beer bong enthusiast from San Diego. Eventually the kids from Palmdale showed up again and joined in the bonging and then a redneck family that owned a house by the hostel showed up and joined in as well. I witnessed a lady around 50 or so bong 2 beers at one time….while seated at her bar stool. Her kids and grand kids didn’t look surprised at all. My buddy from San Diego had made numerous attempts to join his friends and go to sleep but I kept refusing and drug him out in the parking lot to hang out with the kids from Palmdale and their crew of 20 locals….yeah, I don’t know where they came from. In the middle of the chaos he managed to slip away by saying to Leo, “I’m gonna go to the bathroom, I’ll be right back.” He was never seen again for the remainder of the trip. Leo miraculously kept up with me the whole night until we both walked out to our tents to sleep….well he slept in a tent and I just jumped in my sleeping bag and slept in the sand.

The next day (Saturday) Leo and Marianne went for a hike to the volcano that we didn’t make it to the previous day and Joe, Wayne, and I cooked our crab meat along with mussels that Wayne had found for us. It came out really good…..especially with the mounds of butter we used! After lunch we packed our stuff up and hitched a ride with Wayne into town to meet up with Marianne and Leo. Joe and I ate a few fish tacos, then purchased a Cuomo each and sat outside a store to watch the people in the town. While we were sitting there we saw a car full of 7 year olds drive by swerving all over the road. It was one of the funniest things I have ever seen….only in Mexico! Eventually we met up with Marianne and Leo. As we were getting ready to leave some crazy lady came running down the road screaming with blood all over herself. Joe tried to talk to her but she was too out of it to say what the problem was. Then a fat guy with no shirt on riding on a 4 wheeler came zipping by, grabbed the bleeding lady, and they took off for the clinic. With that strange, random event we ended our vacation and took off for San Diego. We stopped briefly in Ensenada again and then made it to San Diego. Joe and I jumped in my car and took off to Blythe, AZ while Marianne and Leo stayed at a hostel in Ocean Beach. Joe and I were going to sleep on top of these big hay stacks we found but Joe didn’t think it was a good idea….and it probably wasn’t. So instead I pulled off at Blythe and we stayed across the street from a gas station in what turned out to be an RV park. The next day we woke up to loud traffic and RV’s and took off for Tucson. On the way we stopped to have a world famous “date shake” in Dateland, AZ.

The end.

A Weekend in Strawberry, Arizona

2006-01-25T13:10:00.000-08:00

So here is the whole story of Joe and my adventure to Strawberry, AZ (the name of the town really ties the story together). The story didn’t actually take place in Strawberry, it was really in Payson, but Strawberry sounds much better and the town consisted of everything one could ever want – a cheap log cabin hotel, 3 bars and random antique shops containing trinkets from Fostoria, OH. Anyway, the purpose of the journey to Payson was for Joe (crazy teacher guy) and me to go hiking – which turned out to have some amazing natural wonders. We got there on a Saturday night so we looked around for the cheapest, dirtiest hotel possible (the Budget Inn) and then went on a search for something to do. Payson has nothing in it except fast food places, hotels, a Wal-Mart…..and yes, a casino. We decided on the casino because it had a free shuttle that would pick us up at our hotel and drive us back later. After chugging down a couple Hurricanes we purchased from the cross-eyed girl at the gas station we rode our shuttle to the casino. This casino was the smallest casino I have ever seen. It consisted of one large room full of slot machines, a bar and a room for black jack and hold ‘em. We immediately went to the bar and ordered Smirnoff vodka drinks for $2.50 each! Joe, of course, took a double vodka on the rocks. We walked around the slot room and noticed that at least 1 out of 5 people were lugging around oxygen tanks and breathing through respirators. We even so one old lady pull her respirator out so she could smoke a cigarette….I told Joe, “That’s perseverance at its finest.” The goal of the night was to win our money for the $60 hotel back. Joe started aimlessly throwing nickels into a slot machine and lost a couple bucks. He then decided to up the anti and start shoving 20’s into the dollar slot machines. I left him for a while to check if the casino had anything more to offer, but of course I came up empty. When I returned to Joe, I found him counting his winnings which totaled up to about $30. I was dumbfounded and told him to stop playing and keep the money since he had achieved his goal of paying for his share of the room. I put my name in on the Hold ‘em table and waited….and waited…..Then, as if magically, I found myself really, really drunk when my name was finally called. I have only played online so I didn’t know the rules. I was throwing all my chips in the pot and trying to go all-in but I guess you can’t in this casino game. I’m sure everyone was amused by my antics. That and every time the waitress was in site I was screaming at her for another drink – except I could never remember what I was drinking (even though I was drinking screwdrivers all night). Either these old guys at the table were really bad or I was really lucky cuz I ended up killing them all. I won a couple small hands and then one really big hand. As I fell over the table to hoard all of my chips over to myself, I looked at the dealer and said, “Heyyy buddddy, I’lm outt.” He helped me rack the chips which ended up being a little over $100 – I think. There were a few chips left over so I gave them to the dealer. I’m not sure how many were there but he seemed pretty pleased with it. He gave me a wad of cash and I staggered my way back to my home (the bar). I found Joe sitting there talking to some old lounge singer about music and places to hike so I got up and went to the restroom. When I came back the bartender gave me my credit card back and told me to get out. According to me, I was kicked out for dominating everyone in my card game. But Joe claims there were security guards and police watching me stagger my way to the bathroom and decided that I was no longer welcome in the casino. This was a defining moment in my life as I have never been kicked out of my first bar/casino. In the van on the way back to the hotel I remembered it was Mrs. Sarah Kolks’ birthday so I had all the old people take out their respirators and sing “happy birthday.”

And if that night wasn’t great enough, breakfast at a random diner the next day topped it. But before I get into this story, let me tell you what I found before me when I opened my eyes after a long, drunken sleep. I heard singing and jumping in the room as I regained consciousness. I slowly opened my eyes, and saw Joe standing over me on my bed wearing skin tight navy long john pants and shirt. He was standing with his hands on his hips and legs spread with his chest perched out as if proud of his appearance. He then started singing at the top of his lungs, “Dancerrrrrrr, Prancerrrrrrr, Underpantserrrrrrrr!”

He then jumped off of my bed and began prancing around the room singing this ridiculous song of his. This song and dance routine entertained me for at least 10 minutes until his mood changed and he complained that we wouldn’t be able to hike because I had slept too long. Oh, and for the rest of the day Joe talked in third person and referred to himself as “Dancer Prancer Underpantser.” To this day, he still responds to the name and will prance around gaily if you call him it.

Now, I will continue on with the remainder of the story. Words cannot explain what Joe and I saw in this diner the next day but I will try my best. As soon as we walked in to this place, we knew we had hit the jackpot. It was overly crowded as any good diner would be on a Sunday morning so we sat at the bar area. Our waitress was mean and terrible – just as we had hoped. We ordered our food and then took a glance at the creatures around us. We discovered that we were in a different world in this place. There were cowboys – the handle bar moustaches, hats, button-up shirts, tight pants (I saw some chaps too) and boots kind of cowboys (the real thing). There were also a couple “bruisers” in there – the gigantic, bald-headed guys that always seem to be in a bad mood and wanting to fight something. The women all had feathered hair with a perm and bangs, cowboy shirts, tight pants, and cowboy boots. These descriptions described everyone in the diner….not just one or two. The fellars next to us just happened to be talking about artificially inseminating cows. We got our food relatively fast but ended up staying in this place for well over an hour so that we could absorb just what the hell was going on. I am sure that if we were to ever return to this diner these people wouldn’t be there. This was just one of those cases where you step out of the realm of reality and enter a completely bizarre world.

I hope this story entertained you as much as it did us, having lived through it.